Anxious
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I'm supposed to go on a date tomorrow evening...

And I'm [b][i]anxious af.[/i][/b]

He's the guy that wanted to hurry and meet me. The one that wanted a full body pic. I didn't appreciate being asked that but... Y'know, I don't want to mark someone off just for asking. He didn't pressure me either.

We're supposed to meet tomorrow but I'm soo nervous. Nervous he'll kidnap me or worse. But then I remind myself that I'm overthinking... I'm smarter than I give myself credit for.

I won't leave my drink alone with him. I won't leave with him. I won't be alone with him. Maybe go somewhere else afterward to do some shopping so he can't follow me home but then again, maybe that too is an irrational thought.

Oh my gosh I'm so anxious I feel like I'm going to barf. Calm down, Jupe... Caaaalm dowwwn 😣🤢
You already know the dos and don’ts. Just inform a family member of your whereabouts and tell them to call you after a certain amount of time, to check on you.

Stay safe n have fun! 🤗💙
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@Vivaci Thank you 🤗
@JupiterDreams you’re welcome, Jupes! 🤗💙🌸
Adaydreambeliever · 56-60, F
Okies. I was dating for a few years.. keep some rules in mind..

1) never meet anyone you feel unsure about. This is called having good radar.. it will keep you safe.. If you aren't sure keep talking to them until you feel safe.
2) even if you feel safe never ever meet anyone on your own.. meet in a public place, with lots of people around. dont pick him up from the station, don't ride in the same car together..
3) make sure you tell someone where you are going.. and ideally have them call you or text after 30 mins or so to check you are ok.. if you aren't ok have a code word and they can come get you.

A good way to think about this is.. are yo more nervous of 'this' person than anyone else youve met? If so don't do it!!! Always listen to your gut feelings..
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@Adaydreambeliever This is all very useful, thank you 🤗💞
twiigss · M
@Adaydreambeliever [quote]If you aren't sure keep talking to them until you feel safe. [/quote]

This is something all women used to do back in the mid 1990's. The last woman I was talking to on a dating site, she was up and ready to meet next day, and I'm sitting here thinking, well..... wait a minute. Shouldn't there be more time to talk first before we meet?

But I think a lot of it is coming down to, well there's only so much we can talk about, and they think well we need to move this step faster? I dunno. It really threw me for a loop when this girl was like, okay we talked for 2 hours, meet, NOW! That's what it felt like anyway.

And normally, when a guy asks to meet, after 3 weeks of talking, she disappears completely. That's how it used to be anyway. You had to wait for her to bring up meeting in person, or you had to ask, but not in a way that she would think was too forceful.

I guess this is partly why I don't even try to date anymore. You can't win. Hi, I'm an honest and nice guy, let's chat. Girl: Uhhh I gotta go. I give up!
MrPerditus1 · 61-69, M
Being cautious when you haven't met someone before isn't a bad thing. As several have mentioned, let someone know where you're going to be. About how long and when to hear from you. You've thought it all through and yes, you never know who you're really meeting. But being aware of your surroundings is a good thing.

I would say, if you're still really nervous and you have a friend or family member you trust, tell them to call you at a certain time and even go so far as to come up with a safe word that you don't often use, then if anything is wrong while you're on the call with them, you can say it in a sentence that will alert them to something wrong. Just saying if you're that worried, take all precautions.

I'm fairly sure you'll be fine, but it never hurts to be prepared. You're a smart lady and you'll do just fine. I'm wishing you the best and hope you have a great time and that it's just a case of nerves. 🤗 🌷
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@MrPerditus1 Thank you 🤗💞
Adogslife · 61-69, M
Yes, do relax a bit. He’s probably a decent guy and the pic request is not uncommon. It’s just to be sure that you fit within a body type range that’s normal for him.

Immediately on the first date my current gf asked me, within the first few sentences, in her charming English accent, if I was an axe murderer. I laughed and said no, but then asked her if she’d ever had a penchant for boiling bunnies. Guys need to be safe too.

Just give someone you care about his name and phone number. Tell them where you’re going and share your location with them via “find a friend”.

If you’re worried about your drink, I believe they make nail polish that will change color if there’s something in your drink. Maybe check that out on line.

Breakfast and a walk can make a great first date too. Safe. No drinks. No worries about how to “end the evening” either.

Good luck 👍🏻
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@Adogslife Thank you so much 💞🤗
Adogslife · 61-69, M
@JupiterDreams you’re welcome. relax and enjoy
SW-User
Aww,, Best of luck to you sweetie '
Being nervous is normal but you already are smart girl and I'm sure you will be careful 😌
Stay safe and have fun💗
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@SW-User Thank you 🤗
SW-User
@JupiterDreams 💗🤗
Penny · 46-50, F
this is why internet dating sucks. like if youve never met them before... did you facetime him or skype first?
Penny · 46-50, F
@JupiterDreams please facetime him or somehting for your own safety. i think a lot can be gleaned from someones voice and to actually see them while theyre talking is better. dont be shy you are beautiful no matter what if he rejects you over facetime better than in person too (assuming that you are scared of that)

also- if he wont show you his facebook if he has one then hes hiding something or just wants sex
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@Penny I will 🌺
I'd rather be rejected because I'm honestly more worried about being physically harmed. He hasn't said anything to warrant my anxiety... I've always been nervous about new things so I'm skittish 😥
Penny · 46-50, F
@JupiterDreams well, these things i suggested arent a 100% that some psycho isnt going to show up in his place but id think itd be safer. especially if you get his facebook. if he has a facebook and theres no one on it then thats a major red flag
I don’t think I’d go out with someone if I had to take those precautions, but then, it’s different for women.
JupiterDreams · 31-35
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@HeilHitler That was going to be my next suggestion. Or arrange for a friend to call at a specific time, and if she doesn't answer, call the police.

It really sucks that women have to think about this. I can't count how many women I've gone on dates with, and I never thought about my own safety even once. I wonder how many of them were asking themselves if they would be safe with me.
JoePourMan · 61-69, M
Caution is good, trust your instincts. Have a friend on speed dial that knows where you are going.
Having done all that relax and enjoy
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@JoePourMan Thank you 🌺
DeluxedEdition · 26-30, F
when they do the nudes stuff. with the sending and asking too early i dip
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@DeluxedEdition nooo it wasn't a nude, he just wanted to see me from top to bottom because I only ever show selfies haha
Omg I’m so excited for you!!
@MonaLisa86 Why can’t you do both 🤷‍♀️
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JupiterDreams · 31-35
@SweetNSassy 🤗🌺
SW-User
You are amazing. Straighten your crown, Queen. You got this. 😌
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@SW-User 🤗💞
SW-User
@JupiterDreams 🤗🌺
ExtremeNext · 31-35
I can't believe how nervous you sound, it's just a date have fun get to know him lol
If he is some kind of serial killer his freezer is probable full of young girls heads anyway
At most you might lose a nose finger or toe
Just relax
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@ExtremeNext Lol I'll try. But my experience with men hasn't been the best and I'm like... What if this is the big one? A murderer??!
twiigss · M
@JupiterDreams I was never really safe when I was meeting women from the AOL chat room. I met this one woman, I think she was within 5 years of my age, well she's driving us, that was scary. She's speeding, blaring her music and to top it off, mid ride she decides to tell me that she doesn't have a drivers license!

Let's just say that was that, when we got back to her place, I grabbed my keys and left. Quickly lol. That was all back in the mid 1990's. Now I make sure to meet at a public place and stuff because nowadays you don't know who'll be there, and if they have ulterior motives or something.
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@twiigss Aww oh my gosh haha 🥺🤗
Stressedout · 31-35, F
Ahh yay Jupe! How exciting, it's hard but think of everything you can just to calm yourself down. "Like, this guy ain't shit. I'm the best I'm amazing a total catch and it's his loss if he don't see that. No one's perfect he's probably nervous too. Life will go on and there is nothing to be nervous about." I used to get so nervous on dates I'd have to have a drink. Ugh 😂
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@Stressedout Aww good idea haha, I'll try to calm myself down 😥😣 It's so hard bahaha
passingby8 · 31-35, F
Be safe!Cant you do a web cam date instead before meeting up that way you get a better idea of the vibe?
Also tell some one who your going with like a close friend or fam.
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@passingby8 Thank you 🤗
passingby8 · 31-35, F
@JupiterDreamsFor reals though i hope u do try the webcam like some one else suggested too.Doing that has spared me from a few bad dates.
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@passingby8 I will 🥺
twiigss · M
Awwww everything will go just fine Jupe :)

But, definitely be cautious and safe sure. Go to a cafe for a drink or whatever, hang out and talk for a bit, maybe see a movie or grab a bite to eat, and call it a day and go do your shopping.

And definitely don't leave your drink alone with him. But I think you'll be okay :)
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@twiigss 🤗💞
GunFinger · F
Please take care. Let a close friend or a family member know you're doing this and update them every hour what you're up to and ask them to call every now and then. Going shopping is a good plan. If you get uncomfortable it's not bad to cut the date short. We're always here for you.🤗
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@GunFinger Thank you 🤗💞 I will 🌺
1490wayb · 56-60, M
i believe hs is pushing too hard too fast
you told him too much personal info
you live close to one another??
1490wayb · 56-60, M
@JupiterDreams youve been chatting how long may i ask??
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@1490wayb A week
1490wayb · 56-60, M
@JupiterDreams most here encourage you to go
i believe its too soon
have others check in on you if you do meet
better to meet as a part of group for safety reasons
OnePatheticClown · 51-55, M
Yep, take it slowly and play it safe, but I'm sure it all will be ok.

Tho one of those concealed swords would be a good investment...if needed you can beat him with a stick or chop him with a sword! :D
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@OnePatheticClown Good idea lol
fun4us2b · M
Stay in the moment - don't make any promises other than "call me"
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@fun4us2b Thank you 🌺
fun4us2b · M
@JupiterDreams I look back and wonder why I was always in such a rush...make time stand still if you can.
Noreaster · F
He's the one who should be anxious. You got this Jupe!
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@Noreaster Thank you 🤗🌺
LunarOrbit · 56-60, M
Well!!??!! How did it go??
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@LunarOrbit I might make a post about it 😜 But it was nice! We had an earlyish dinner. It wasn't a long date but I enjoyed it. He was nice and talkative, not pushy or anything 🌺
LunarOrbit · 56-60, M
@JupiterDreams Awesome!!! So glad it went well for you!
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@LunarOrbit ☺️🤗
Did you meet him??
SW-User
@JupiterDreams you didn't like him that much it seems 😁
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@SW-User I don't know how to explain it but I just didn't feel inspired, I suppose, haha
SW-User
@JupiterDreams it's ok, it's rare to really click with someone. To like them or anything really. 👌
SW-User
Hope it goes well just be cautious
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@SW-User I will, thank you 🌺
JoyfulSilence · 46-50, M
I hope he is sweet and you have fun!
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@JoyfulSilence Thank you 🌺
Quetzalcoatlus · 46-50, M
Sounds like a douche
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@Quetzalcoatlus noooo lol
MougyWolf · 36-40, M
[youtube=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dOSisj72gg]
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@MougyWolf noicee
MougyWolf · 36-40, M
@JupiterDreams thank you! ^_~
Sure, but will you wear your best matching bra and panties?
Bang5luts · M
You'll do fine and if you're really uncomfortable that's your gut telling you something. Don't easily just dismiss your gut feelings. Also, if you're uncomfortable, you should ask a Male friend, brother, cousin, uncle someone to go to the same place sit at a table far enough away that they aren't intruding but closer enough to be there if you need. I hope it works out! I hope he's a decent person! Good luck and have fun!
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@Bang5luts Thank you 💞 I think this is just anxiety and not a gut feeling. I've had gut feelings about other people and avoided the people. But this doesn't feel like that... More like irrational worry bahahaha
Bang5luts · M
@JupiterDreams ok. Well I hope it all goes well 😊
Zonuss · 41-45, M
Just do it.
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@Zonuss 😥🙀
Mrsbetweenfatandfit · 26-30, F
So exciting!! Sounds like he’s very interested in getting to know you more if he was so eager to meet you. You’re being safe which is important but try to enjoy the date without too much thinking about the possibilities of wrongs. 🌷
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@Mrsbetweenfatandfit Or maybe he's eager because he has the urge to hurt someone 😥 And I'm not jokinggg omgoshhh
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JupiterDreams · 31-35
@Darksideinthenight2 Awww haha 🥺🤗💞
empanadas · 31-35, M
Yo how did it go?
empanadas · 31-35, M
@JupiterDreams he fucked up in other words
JupiterDreams · 31-35
@empanadas nooo haha, I just didn't feel inspired to see him again, if that makes sense 😆
empanadas · 31-35, M
@JupiterDreams he fucked up

 
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