Struggles & Identity > Trauma

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I Was Molested My By My Dad

It has always made me feel guilty. Idk I guess maybe I think its my fault somehow. It happened for a long time when I was younger but I never had the nerve to tell anyone. I still wonder if it would have been different if i had.

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unusualme · 56-60, M

It’s not your fault at all! Please get some professional counselling so that so that you won’t be taking baggage that shouldn’t be yours unnecessarily!
That is so sad to read but opening up is a good sign of recovery!

fernie2

You were a victim! Still are! Nothing was your fault. The man was demented. I hope he's dead. NOW is the time to deal with this so you can STOP feeling any responsibility for what HE DID TO YOU! I was molested by sick males (redundant) from age 6-11. I didn't tell till I was 30. I don't know how or why but, on some level I've always known I was the victim. Don't let him make you feel guilty...the predators know kids will. SAY IT!!!! DON'T GIVE HIM ONE MORE SECOND OF YOUR LIFE ...it will have a big, negative impact on the rest of your life. SAY IT! (i'm 300 years old...trust me)

SubstantialKick · 31-35, M

How are you doing nowadays? I'm sure it can take some years to recover from something like that.

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Bklynbadboy12 · 31-35, M

Damn I'm sorry you had to go through that and it wasn't you fault. But you have to tell someone

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Mynudi · M

You should never feel guilty, and it's never your fault. 🤗🤗

Court69 · M

I was to can be hard to deal with

EasyFriend

@Court69 yes

FatherTime · 56-60, M

omg I'm so sorry sweetie <3 pm me <3

Sjones13 · 41-45, M

That’s so sad

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EasyFriend

I do understand

kel25

Ok so my father is a child molester and I know the type of guilt you're talking about. First off as everyone says its not your fault,. I know easy to say but not so easy to believe. Pretend you are someone else telling yourself your story.. What would you tell her?
There is another part of this that I came in touch with in therapy.. Another reason the guilt is heavy. You still love your dad, hard to explain. Why love a monster? It must be because I have fault in this.. No wrong. Ok imagine your Memories with your father are all in a box. There will be black sections for the bad and white for the good. Some of the white made who you are today so it okay to love those parts.
My suggestion to you, once you feel ready go to therapy (i wasn't big in therapy until I saw first hand how help ful it can be) you don't need to publicly anounce but seeing a therapist can go a long way.

Wishing you the best -xo

kimber14 · 22-25, F

thanks

EasyFriend

@kel25 Good perspectives and good suggestions. We are complicated creatures.

samueltyler2 · 80-89, M

If you have not been in therapy, you need to be. You should never feel guilty for being molested!

looking4thesun · M

this is not really something that you should have to keep to yourself. you definately have nothing to feel guilty about

Pretzel · 61-69, M

wasn't your fault
never was
not even a little
and doesn't mean you are less than a good person!

looking4thesun · M

you ever feel like talking about it, feel free to message me

Cargan2016

I would find some one you trust and tell them and how you waited so long because had been afraid it would be seen as your fault. It is not I my self would report my own molester but I dont remember her name or even the exact time it happened just that was a babysitter when i was young. it is never the victims fault

luvin2flirt · 61-69, M

Bless your heart... sick people out there

BradScott

It is never, EVER, a child's fault when molested. It's very common to not tell, but if you had he would have likely been arrested, jailed, convicted, and spent many years in prison followed by up to a lifetime on the sex offender registry.

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cheesenbread

The question is how has it affected you now....?

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kimber14 · 22-25, F

I dunno I mean it isnt their fault

SlimTony

But do you shy away from them and get nervous in sexual situations because of your experience or did you become the opposite and more promiscuous ?

Captainawesome · 31-35, M

@kimber14 the hell it isnt the best to stop a man from sexually assaulting someone is a for a man to decide not to sexually assualt someone. If a man sees a girl and think she is pretty wants to rape her. All he has to do and its tricky is make the Choice not to rape her.

Bluesky52 · 61-69, M

why do you feel it's your fault?what makes me sick is lawyers defending molesters,

Donna15

It is not ur fault, when a dad wants to do that he will no matter what u do

luvinlifeguy

i was molested too, by my aunt, when she used to babysit me

SolidHeart · 46-50, M

Do you wish to revenge from your dad for molesting you?

ego5

You have to tell someone sweetheart xx

QuietEd2019 · 31-35, M

Soo awful for you to have been through this 💔💔💔💔

QuietEd2019 · 31-35, M

Definitely is not your fault at all for his actions

sxylaura

So sad, hope youre over it :)

iris115461

pm me i miss our talks

Mathsman

Id like to hear your experinces too

samueltyler2 · 80-89, M

Are you in therapy?

EasyFriend

@samueltyler2 Therapy can help, yes. But ultimately, the experiences and feelings are always something we have to put effort into managing. Therapy helps one to cope, but isn't a cure. I'm not saying you don't know this, just making the observation.