Showering and eating helped with the sadness 😌

I still don't know where to go from here though, today or more long term. Something is missing from my life, but I don't know what. Every time I encounter something that feels like it might be fulfilling, it quickly turns into disappointment.

Whenever I think of a new hobby, I either run into complications that make it more frustrating than fun, or it gets boring after a few days. When I see a new message in my inbox here, people tend to log out after 5 minutes and/or after a while we just start to repeat the same topics.

Anything that made me satisfied in the past no longer does, so I don't know what to look for or work towards, which makes me feel rather hopeless and powerless. 😕

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LordShadowfire · 46-50, M

The thing I learned a long time ago is this. You're not objectively any different because you have a new hobby or a new toy. That won't make you happy. It distracts you for a while from the sadness, but the sadness remains.

What you need is to work through and find the source of your sadness. The source of the depression. Chances are, it's some internal dialogue that you haven't questioned in a long time.

NerdyPotato · M

@LordShadowfire the core problem is probably touch deprivation, but with a disability making it difficult to get to know a lot of people in person, I'm not going to find a partner to fix that and I have no money for massages or something either.

LordShadowfire · 46-50, M

@NerdyPotato

Here's an idea. You're pretty good at expressing yourself over the internet. Start there. Start by finding a network that lets you make friends in your area. Not a dating network. Too much goddamn pressure on those things. Once you start making online friends, but locally, your chances of finding one who wants to be more than friends increase.

At least in theory. I'm still working this one myself to see what happens, lol.

NerdyPotato · M

@LordShadowfire yeah, dating sites are pointless. Nobody is themselves there and everyone is loves to travel and finds a sense of humor important, without specifying what kind. I've looked for local online communities before, but there doesn't seem to be anything like that here. I've even been recommended a couple of different sites for that, but they only have one group in the Netherlands 2 hours away, if any at all. Maybe I need to start my own, but that's a lot of work and how do I get people to join without meeting them first?

LordShadowfire · 46-50, M

@NerdyPotato Presumably, there are more people like you who do better at meeting people online than in person. Start a meetup that you would attend.

NerdyPotato · M

@LordShadowfire I'm not sure how to invite people to that though. If I could find them, I could connect with them without a group. 😅

LordShadowfire · 46-50, M

@NerdyPotato Back in the day, meetup.com was a good place for that. I don't know if they have that where you live. But the idea is, first you create the group, schedule a couple of meetings, nobody comes, and eventually somebody discovers it and asks why more people aren't in it.

NerdyPotato · M

@LordShadowfire I've checked that out before, and again now. The only thing somewhat within reach is a course on business presentations. 😒

LordShadowfire · 46-50, M

@NerdyPotato Wow. Sorry. ☹

NerdyPotato · M

@LordShadowfire thanks for the suggestion though.