Thoughts on loss
Does loss create sickness resulting in eventual death? I wonder this because I’ve experienced so many losses, that I’m just not sure if my body can handle much more trauma. They say losing a pet is just as bad, if not worse than losing a person. I recently found out that my dog may have a malignant tumor in his gum, and still have yet to know the true results of the scan. They sent it to the lab, and I’m still waiting. And I’m not saying that losing my dog will cause me to die, but I’m going to feel this loss stronger than most. We have decided against having the tumor removed as they told us in order to do that, they would have to remove the whole left side of his lower jaw. This is because he is a toy breed, and in order to remove the tumor they have to remove A certain amount. I forget how much they said, but it would result in the whole lower left jaw, which is devastating.
My dog has already endured enough in his life, that we chose not to go through with the surgery if it’s malignant…which means I will have to accept that we will be waiting out his last days until he tells us it’s his time. I have given this dog my heart. If it weren’t for me, this dog would not have lived so long. With all the issues he’s had, anyone else may have put him down a long time ago because he contracted diseases at a young age that caused us to spend a lot of money. But I will tell you something: I wouldn’t have traded it for anything. He has been loyal, loving, sentimental, and happy. This dog has been such a joy to have around, and when he’s gone, a huge piece of me will go with him.
Back to my earlier question though…Does loss create sickness eventually resulting in death? I’ve had people walk out of my life that I regret, family who have died, and family who don’t care to speak with me for god know what reasons (I don’t know). The reason I ask that question is because my heart has taken so many hits, I’m just sad all the time. There are bits of happiness here and there, but I don’t feel like it’s enough to fill the sadness or keep it at bay. And I feel like if I have too much sadness clouding my mood, that it will cause other things to go wrong with my health. There has to be a way to stop it, but I don’t know what that is.
My dog has already endured enough in his life, that we chose not to go through with the surgery if it’s malignant…which means I will have to accept that we will be waiting out his last days until he tells us it’s his time. I have given this dog my heart. If it weren’t for me, this dog would not have lived so long. With all the issues he’s had, anyone else may have put him down a long time ago because he contracted diseases at a young age that caused us to spend a lot of money. But I will tell you something: I wouldn’t have traded it for anything. He has been loyal, loving, sentimental, and happy. This dog has been such a joy to have around, and when he’s gone, a huge piece of me will go with him.
Back to my earlier question though…Does loss create sickness eventually resulting in death? I’ve had people walk out of my life that I regret, family who have died, and family who don’t care to speak with me for god know what reasons (I don’t know). The reason I ask that question is because my heart has taken so many hits, I’m just sad all the time. There are bits of happiness here and there, but I don’t feel like it’s enough to fill the sadness or keep it at bay. And I feel like if I have too much sadness clouding my mood, that it will cause other things to go wrong with my health. There has to be a way to stop it, but I don’t know what that is.
41-45, F
