I am feeling guilty

I think I suffer with a ridiculous guilt complex. I always have. I once had a boss ask me if I was raised Catholic and I said no why and she said she went to Catholic schools growing up and she's never known anyone with such a guilt complex like mine who wasn't Catholic. Was an odd interaction but it's stuck with me. I have always felt guilty for things even things that aren't mine like other people's actions or words like somehow I have guilt by association. Any ways..... I am feeling guilty because a lot of my colleagues and previous colleagues have been laid off. Some colleagues I had worked with for years just recently were laid off last week and they are really upset. I feel guilty because I secretly wish I was laid off, I need the money but I am burned out and have lost all my motivation or drive. I feel guilty because I should be grateful that I have a job when so many people are being let go. I don't feel grateful though and I just feel guilty. I need to find some gratitude and stop feeling guilty. I wasn't the one making the decisions to let people go, and if I could I would give up my job to someone who was let go but they want me specifically because I have the experience and knowledge that some in my field don't have. I also have three different jobs here but if you've read this far thanks for letting me vent about my guilt. I feel like a jerk right now. I hope I can find a place of gratitude soon for my job

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BackyardShaman · 61-69, M

You’ve nothing to feel guilty for, and you’re not alone with this. Unearned guilt is destructive to someone’s self esteem and is used by those that want to dominate you, like your employer that made the ridiculous statement about Catholics basically stating you were inferior to catholic associates. It’s actually not legal to discriminate based on religious preferences the way she did. Anyway any time you get feelings of guilt, ask yourself if you earned it by behavior, if not, it’s false.

Waymor · M

Seems to me like you’re too good for your own self. My mama is always telling me that, you can’t carry the world on your shoulders. It sounds like that’s what you’re trying to do. If I was a betting man I’d bet that you are a HSP. If you want to you can let me know if I’m right.

Whyme · 46-50, M

Ild say think of it as yes your happy for a good job but you are there for you not them

LordShadowfire · 46-50, M

That sounds like a lesser variant of survivors guilt. It's based on the erroneous idea that you don't deserve the jobs you have.

Please notice the key word erroneous. As in you're wrong.

It's actually better for someone with your experience and qualifications to be doing what you do. You are performing a valuable service.

SW-User

@LordShadowfire yes it's just tough I've been in their shoes. Ive been laid off before and I know how hard it is and how bad it feels to be let go from a Company when you've given them so much. Any ways I know you're right about the experience piece and the guilt is not helping the situation

Ravens80 · 46-50, F

@SW-User May I ask what field you’re in that’s laying off employees? Around here companies need employees and can’t find any that will or want to work.

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