Is it wrong for a heterosexual woman in a loving relationship to state that she does not need a man?
Poll - Total Votes: 26 See Poll Options
EnjoyingLife · 70-79, F
REMsleep · 41-45, F
@EnjoyingLife I understand my condolences
BlueVeins · 26-30
It's not really a gender thing, just kinda hurtful to hear that someone you love "doesn't need" you. IDK if I'd say it's morally wrong, but I don't think you should be surprised that people are weirded out by it. Also depends on the relationship in question (i.e. dating for 2 weeks vs 6 years & engaged).
drymer · 56-60, M
Reading all the comments it seems that lot of people are confusing "Need" with "Love", as if "loving someone" implied "needing someone". These are very different things. I know it's very romantic to say "I need you" to a loved one. People like to be needed and wanted. But seriously people, love is something else. To "need a man" or to "need a woman" has absolutely nothing to do with love.
REMsleep · 41-45, F
@drymer I agree with what you said and at 1 time in my life I was a hopeless romantic and I would have agreed with preferring to say that I needed my husband but unfortunately life dealt me situations beyond my control and people in my life made decisions that forced me to confront the reality that I do not need a man
drymer · 56-60, M
drymer · 56-60, M
I think it's rather a compliment to your husband... Basically you are saying that you live with your husband not because you "need a man", but because you "want / love" your husband... I don't understand how that can be possibly insulting... Maybe they misconstrued what you said and interpreted that you were saying your husband was "useless" or something...?
🤔
🤔
MsAlaineEYes · F
zonavar68 · 56-60, M
@MsAlaineEYes This is about how I feel about women after being jilted and jaded and made to feel so unworthy and sub-standard as part of a so-called loving couple. It's a pointless exercise to need or want a relationship any more so I don't really bother trying to notice anyone or be noticed by anyone.
bijouxbroussard · F
I agree with you, it’s not necessarily insulting depending on the context. Plenty of heterosexual women don’t “need” men in the traditional sense—they earn their own money and live happy independent lives. It doesn’t mean they don’t want a man or aren’t happy with and love the men who are in their lives.
ginnyfromtheblock · 26-30, F
REMsleep · 41-45, F
@ginnyfromtheblock Many people have a romanticized idea of need which I too hold onto somewhat especially considering my religious upbringing.
But in that moment I was speaking in a purepragmatic sense and they all shamed me telling me that I had toxic mindset.
But in that moment I was speaking in a purepragmatic sense and they all shamed me telling me that I had toxic mindset.
What other people think is not important. How does your husband feel?
It all depends on the context in which you use those words.
Women no longer 'need' men, to give them stability, a home, money etc. Women can be independent and love the man they are with. Big difference, thankfully.
It all depends on the context in which you use those words.
Women no longer 'need' men, to give them stability, a home, money etc. Women can be independent and love the man they are with. Big difference, thankfully.
View 1 more replies »
SW-User
@zonavar68 no idea who that is...
zonavar68 · 56-60, M
@SW-User https://www.google.com/search?q=clingy+girlfriend+meme
SpoiledRottenPassengerPrincess · 41-45, F
braveheart21 · 61-69, M
Yoo hoo... Here i am.... 😂😂😂😂😂@SpoiledRottenPassengerPrincess
SpoiledRottenPassengerPrincess · 41-45, F
@braveheart21 sorry, seats taken!
braveheart21 · 61-69, M
Lol.... 👍👍👍👍👍@SpoiledRottenPassengerPrincess
Redstar · 36-40, M
Those poll options are unfortunately rather limited. I don't think it's wrong but I don't think it insults the male partner.
I think the statement is self explanatory. You don't NEED a man and you'd be okay if you weren't married but that doesn't mean you don't love and want to be with your Husband.
I think the statement is self explanatory. You don't NEED a man and you'd be okay if you weren't married but that doesn't mean you don't love and want to be with your Husband.
REMsleep · 41-45, F
zonavar68 · 56-60, M
My ex did almost exactly that - from the instant she found out she was pregnant with our daughter in late 2016 or early 2017 she decided I was no longer required. She told all her friends she was pregnant many weeks before she told me.
Now she's in a relationship with a former high school friend who is also 'single', so work that one out.
Now she's in a relationship with a former high school friend who is also 'single', so work that one out.
Ambroseguy80 · 56-60, M
MasterofNone · 26-30, M
BalmyNites · F
REMsleep · 41-45, F
@zonavar68 I want to say that your situation sounds very hurtful and terrible but her behaviour was bad no matter what her beliefs were it's not OK to use someone especially not to bring a child into this world and it has nothing to do with women who might feel that they don't need a man
This comment is hidden.
Show Comment
REMsleep · 41-45, F
To many people when they hear the phrase "I don't need a man " it has echoes of extreme feminist propaganda in the statement and is often said by single moms to indicate that they raised their child perfectly fine alone when in actuality a father is necessary in a child's life. So my family took issue that I as a married woman would utter such a damaging statement in their mind and a statement which indicates to the world that men are no longer needed in society but this is not what I meant.
bijouxbroussard · F
@REMsleep
I don't believe in the angry black woman.
Nobody with any intelligence does. But unfortunately that particular stereotype is one of the many ways racism works against us, even intra-racially, as it’s the excuse some black men have given for looking elsewhere.
DeluxedEdition · 26-30, F
Absolutely 🙏@REMsleep
DeluxedEdition · 26-30, F
I believe in a misunderstood and a tired black woman.
Heartbreaking but you are absolutely right. And society will never see it for what it is. Black women extremely caring and and giving but you can only give so much when all people do is take.
@REMsleep
HootyTheNightOwl · 41-45
Psycho · 26-30, M
Well imagine your husband said the same thing about women in the same way you said it then you'll have your answer.
GerOttman · 70-79, M
Laws are for physics, rules are for grammar. Everything else is a choice. Know right from wrong and choose well!
Nomad7 · 26-30, M
How is it insulting? Independent women are great
This comment is hidden.
Show Comment
Eclipsed · M
It reeks of insecurity and self doubt.. but not technically wrong, so knock yourself out.
@Eclipsed how
REMsleep · 41-45, F
Wow you've got it all wrong for my side. I was making the statement in acknowledgment that I have achieved a lot and I've had to do it by myself for the most part and so I don't see how I could say that I needed a man because I had to do everything without one so that's what I was referring to was more or less. Getting somewhere in life and my achievements it was no slight towards men who are very equally necessary in societies overall.
Some women need a man to survive in the world or some people think that they do.
Some women need a man to survive in the world or some people think that they do.
