Only logged in members can reply and interact with the post.
Join SimilarWorlds for FREE »

Do you expect to be treated the way you deserve?

Usually, when someone treats me poorly, I quickly realize that it's not my fault, and they have a problem that has nothing to do with me. But for some reason, before I realize that, I all too often have this thought, What did I do to make them so upset? or What is it about me that makes them see me that way, or want to treat me that way? I almost always manage to dismiss those thoughts, the moment they come, but they still come.

Is it just me, or do other people have those thoughts too, when they're treated badly?

On the flip side, when someone is good to you, do you feel better about yourself, like you must have done something right, to deserve to be treated well?

Of course, we all (hopefully) realize that the way people treat us says a lot more about them than it says about us, but still, that seems to be the default expectation, at least for me. Am I the only one?
This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »
Coralmist · 41-45, F
It's my default to think well they must know more than me or be right about me (if treating me poorly/putting me in negative light).. It's the trauma I had as a child that says
' People know more than YOU. You are small and people don't want to hear you..' I'm finally LEARNING that is beyond false. No one is above another, NO one. I just have been believing toxic thoughts :( So now I'm starting to think, I treat ppl kindly, responsible, caring, help them..if they put me in a bad light, it's not ME...it's their 'story' of me and that is false.
TeresaRudolph71 · 51-55, F
@Coralmist It sounds like you've worked hard to retrain yourself and change your thinking. Good for you! I'm sorry to hear that you had those experiences and had that message drilled into you. I think I did too, though perhaps in different ways. But we're works in progress.
Coralmist · 41-45, F
@TeresaRudolph71 🌹👍