Im so donee

I wana disconnect from the world, pull away from everyone. Stop giving a shit. Regress into the worst version of myself. I just wanna disappear again. For months. I wanna live life on autopilot again. I wanna have the same day over and over while dissociating again. I havent been talking to my friends. They were right to assume i would be the first to pull away. Im such a bad friend. I wish i never met them and i stayed alone like before forever. Life then just felt more simpler, when I hated everyone. When I hated myself over the most stupidest shit ever. When I hated my appearance more than i hated my personality. I kinda wish the pandemic came back. Or atleast I was 12 again

I wanna leave