I Pretend I'm Okay

I just found out an old best friend of mine just moved to the city I live in. He lived 9 hours away and moved literally right next to me and didn't even tell me. We've been friends for years, we even talked about dating and how we wished there wasn't any distance, that he would move here if he could.... then he met this girl and he moved up here with her and I had to find out through a mutual friend. I'm a little sad because I thought our friendship was stronger than that.

I'm not going to say anything because that's just how I am as a person, shit hurts me and I just smile and nod and act like nothing is wrong.

I don't know, tonight is really lame and everyone that is talking to me isn't helping and all I want is for someone to talk to. It's this ugly ugly thing I have because of my avoidant personality disorder. I'm incredibly lonely but push everyone away.

Also I can't see. I'm blind (not really but it feels like it) I need to get glasses, everything is blurry.

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Tatsumi · 31-35, M

Mm. Maybe some sleep would help. A reboot wouldnt be the worst thing. This is why i like keeping melatonin around. Or valarian root or kava kava. Something to relax you for the night, so that tomorrow you can approach these issues with a more stable mindset. In any case, that's what works for me.

littlemoxxie · 31-35, F

To be honest I'm not going to approach it at all. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Tatsumi · 31-35, M

@littlemoxxie: that could work, too, heh. Though, it seems you have already.

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Timb63 · 61-69, M

Ok i have a great friend female i'm male we have ben friends 30 years I love her she lives me over 30 years both of us have ben married 2 x and still in the 2nd neither became single at the same time. Some things are ment to be. We both understand it . Now I don't think I would want to rouin what we have by dating or marring her. It seams the best relationship that has lasted the test of time is the one we have. Just except it for what it is and find a guy that wants the other relationship . Men and women can be just friends. I charish the one i have always will

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littlemoxxie · 31-35, F

I didn't say I wanted to be with him?

Timb63 · 61-69, M

Depends on the standards you set for your self. Self controol respect for other people as well, it seams the world is lacking in all if that any more. Self respect is gone

Timb63 · 61-69, M

My point littlemoxxie is that you are in controol of your happiness , friends come and go. He's with a lady and may not like him talking to you so he stays away. My ex hated my friend marie. Swore there was more than friends never was. In the end my ex cheated not me. So his new girl is prob. The reason he does what he does . You have no controol over that . Go live be happy love and you will find love when you least expect it . Make the man earn your love and respect every day

VeronicaJane

Maybe because you had talked of dating, when he moved there with her, he felt a bit awkward?

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littlemoxxie · 31-35, F

@VeronicaJane: No clue. I hope that's not the case.

VeronicaJane

I know, but sometimes it is. Hard to say though. Best wishes.

littlemoxxie · 31-35, F

Thank you 😊

Backpacker251 · 26-30, M

I hate this kind of expernice. Having someone in your town that you need to work something out with,but you can't any possible way to confront it. Their presense follows you everywhere, like goosebumps😰. How long has it been since you needed glasses?

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Fauxmyope2 · 26-30, F

I hope issues with your friend resolve themselves to your liking. Do you have an eye appointment tomorrow?@littlemoxxie:

littlemoxxie · 31-35, F

@Fauxmyope: I do! I'm hopeful to get it all taken care of. And I think the thing with my friend will probably not change. He hasn't spoken to me in months so I'm assuming it will stay that way ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Fauxmyope2 · 26-30, F

Good luck!@littlemoxxie:

happymax · 51-55, M

Somehow you always seem to find something when your not looking for it.

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