Is it possible to heal together?

@Pretzel I think you are saying that everybody's grief is personal and you can't really share that and I do understand that.
Saying out loud brings a measure of comfort ,but what I really mean is if I dared to talk to people that been through the same thing will it bring more pain or will it actually help?
My sister and I share almost the same story few differences
When her partner died a year ago I didn't know a year later I'd be experiencing the same type of grief.
Sometimes ,talking to her helps because it's like a new language we discovered the language of grief for the death of a spouse -it is different than the death of a parent or other relatives ,which is the only other type of grief I have experienced.
I imagine the death of a child would be a whole different type of pain so, I don't compare my grief to theirs.
Sometimes ,talking to the sister brings great relief and sometimes it brings up some painful memories.
I just wonder if reaching out to other people who have lost spouses or partners would be beneficial.

@Justmeraeagain I know my experience.
My mom killed herself when I was 17 - so when someone loses their loved one that way - I know how it felt. The powerlessness.

Even the same thing with the loss of a pet.

Someone that has been through it wants to throw you a lifeline.

(that is if they are decent people).

@Pretzel I am sorry that you went through that at such a young age
I don't pretend to know that kind of grief I've never experienced that it must have been horrific.

@Justmeraeagain in my case I went numb
then hated her for a decade

then finally allowed myself to understand

it's been half a century - the pain is gone - the memories of the pain are there

and thanks - death is death no matter how you get there -

it happens to us all and it is with good reason called "the great equalizer"

there is a paraphrase of Socrates saying that goes "the ungrieved Ife was one not worth living"

your pain is evidence that he was a good man - we need more of him

@Pretzel He was a patient and very gentle person.
I had a nephew who committed suicide at a very young age.
It was devastating I remember, but having a parent do it when you're so young that would be really hard.