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How would you react if your woman surprised you with a abortion?

How would you feel if you were sleeping with a steady girlfriend for a year, everything was going great, moved in together, and one day you get back and see her sleeping early in bed. You crawl in under the covers and start running your fingers along her hips, and she lovingly rolls away from you, turning her back saying "Not tonight honey, I just had a abortion" and then falls asleep like nothing just happened.

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Primnproper · 56-60, F

I’d be asking myself why there wasn’t a conversation and maybe looking at what’s wrong in the relationship and if you can go forward from it.
I would personally never condone that without discussing it with the father of the child whether it’s supposed to be our bodies or not. That is not acceptable.

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TexasDude · 31-35, M

@ffony So you don't think that all humans are equal and have value?

ffony · M

@TexasDude Those are two different questions. Nice try.

You don't have the data to guess at what I "don't think".

TexasDude · 31-35, M

@ffony I'm not guessing. I asked an honest, non rhetorical question. You could see it as two but it's basically all one in this context. However, you best understand it, it's still a simple, honest request for information, not a guess.

Bleak · 36-40, F

Why haven’t you married her??

TexasDude · 31-35, M

A) Id have married her by that point. B) Id be devastated and our relationship might be over. She would have just killed my son or daughter and that's...that's beyond horrible.

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TexasDude · 31-35, M

@swirlie And I'm waiting for you to stop being rude and/or stop name calling. I refuse to reward rudeness with an answer

TexasDude · 31-35, M

@RedGrizzly For what it's worth, I'm extremely sorry you endured SA. No one deserves that and I'm glad to see you apparently healed enough to talk about it

swirlie · 31-35, F

@TexasDude
...but you're okay with a girl in Texas NOT getting an abortion who's been raped and impregnated by her father or brother, right TexasBoy?

You and those who wear cowboy hats where you live are the definition of the extreme Right-wing of America who live and think just like King George III of Great Britain whom all your ancestors fled from..

TallMtnMedic · M

If she's serious Id leave her on the spot.

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TallMtnMedic · M

@swirlie Assisted actually, surgery tech. You?

swirlie · 31-35, F

@TallMtnMedic
I was asking @Tiredish

TallMtnMedic · M

@swirlie Sorry working, all I saw was "Have you had an abortion?" not who.

Anyway...back to work.

Caleidoscope · F

I mean its her body and unless you have a ‘legal’ right on her ,you shouldn’t expect to know what she does to her body (outside the bedroom)whether its an abortion or regularly taking prescribed drugs.
Having said that ,there must be a trust issue that she has over you ,thats why she never told you in the first place .Way more serious than just an abortion .

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Caleidoscope · F

@TexasDudeokay, Assuming she didn’t abort and gave birth to a child and after a few months or years (chances are few) but if they break up and separate?who’s responsibility will it be then ?His wallet ,her wallet ?
or the child will be left with a trauma that most children go through ?
or the parents ,will leave their own search for a partner and half rear a child with half values and ethics only to grow up in a hostile environment?

All I am saying is a child needs a family and unless there’s that support,both of then should take a call .

TexasDude · 31-35, M

@Caleidoscope Nothing you said justifies killing an innocent baby. You can't kill someone based on "what if." Lots of people suffer in this life, some horribly but we can't know that before birth. And if you are alive things can get better...they can't if you are dead

BeefySenpie · M

I’m assuming you never planned on having a child. I do wonder why she didn’t feel comfortable enough to converse with you about the situation that arose

TexChik · F

I would not be able to trust her again. There should have been a conversation about something so important as the life of our child.

ElwoodBlues · M

I would keep on the lookout for flying unicorns, because I've obviously fallen into some kind of fairy tale

being · 36-40, F

Why have you two grown distant... why she didn't discuss about it..

JesseInTX · 51-55, M

The issue of abortion is much more than a “woman’s right to choose” and that gets over looked a whole lot. Two people agreed to have sex, two people made a baby. Two people should make the decision. There are exceptions than can be handled in the 96 hours after sex.

TheRascallyOne · 31-35, M

That's why I don't date Democrats

Spoiledbrat · F

Use a condom if you don't want children.

MaryJo1996 · 26-30, F

It'd be bloody weird to say the least.

Fertilization · 36-40, F

Since she was a steady gf, it is okay.

CactusJackManson · 46-50, M

It's over

FloorGenAdm · 51-55, M

Something terrible happened to a co-worker and that's pretty much how one of the managers gave me the news...must be the new way to tell people bad news.

ffony · M

You can't kill someone based on "what if."

Nations do it all the time, often with public approval.

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ffony · M

@TexasDude

You''re implying that I said something about killing being 'right.' I did not. You're out of order there.

When is anyone killed based on what if?

Almost every time there's a 'pre-emptive strike'.

TexasDude · 31-35, M

@ffony Still not right

ffony · M

@TexasDude
I'm glad you agree.

Soossie

I’d be very very angry … To me, if I was a man, that would be one unforgivable act by her ..

ffony · M

I might say 'What - you were pregnant?' and 'How did that happen?'

BizSuitStacy · M

There should at least be a discussion first

ffony · M

Asking for a friend?

uncalled4 · 56-60, M

That's a pretty brutal story.

swirlie · 31-35, F

To many women, having an abortion is just another form of birth control. If you don't practice 'safe sex' with your girlfriend, then don't sound so surprised the next time she practices her own solution to your lack of awareness to otherwise have safe sex with her.

Tiredish · F

@swirlie She should discuss it with him beforehand if they actually have a relationship.

If she didnt, then there is no open communication, and trust is broken.

As far as 'safe sex', yeah he shouldnt be surprised that she was pregnant.

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