Honestly thee is really only the Now! yesterday is gone! tomorrow is a promise that may never come

It is difficult.
And those rose tinted glasses on the past get ever bigger lenses the older you get i think.

But it is nonetheless a sad never ending predicable cycle of sadnes if you keep thinking the best was then when there's still so much more out there you just haven't found yet.

Speaking personally, i am a complete cynic when it comes to the idea of love and romance and all that jazz. And have occupied that position for....a long time.
And I thought that was the position where I felt 'safe'.
I mean if you don't get involved you can't get hurt right ?

And then following a completely random conversation with a colleague at work, half my age, whom I've nothing in common with, i make the daft decision to go to a dance class.
Just to watch and see if I could follow the instructions.
...well, I sat and watched (from a safe distance) as these two instructors did their stuff with the dozen or so 'pupils' and thought....this is good !

Everyone was laughing. Feet were getting stepped on. Some were trying to follow the steps on the dance floor while their partners were trying to follow a different pattern of steps...whether they were there or imagined, lots of apologies and eventually it just deteriorated to the point where laughter filled the room while some daft song was playing in the background and everyone just sat down and chatted !
There's more to this story and im still trying to get it straight in my head before posting it as an experience but the point is I would never have seen or witnessed or spoken to any of these equally wacky people if i hadn't taken the random advice from a kid half my age to go somewhere completely out of my comfort zone to do something that scared me to death at the time.

It takes a great deal of practice and introspection.

Starting with detachement from the ego. Expectations are related to how we draw self-value and attach to outcomes.

1-Maybe start with few excercises to recognize your own observer mind during mindful meditations looking at your own thinking patterns. The observer mind doesn't do the thinking and the feeling, it looks at thoughts and feelings without judgements. Do this for as long as possible, every day for 5 minutes. And try to experience compassion towards yourself and then not act on any of the thoughts and feelings. Even when your mind wanders away, observe that too. This teaches the power of inaction. It teaches to be free too.

2- When you have had enough power from that independence, actively change the course of thoughts you believe are against your contentment. Make conscious choices. Much of our thoughts are on autopilot because we built comfort from their familiarity for years. They don't have to be that way.

Contentment is more realistic of a goal than happiness when it comes to mindfulness activities. You want to be content with the changing nature of existence from happy to sad, from love to hatred..etc

You can also try exploring hinduism, Japanese philosophy and Shaolin Buddhism for answers that suit your own individual thoughts. There are so many works even in greek philosophy relating to resilience and contentment.

Personally my inability to live in the now was strongly related to my inability to accept my loved ones finite time alive or in my life, so I had to process much grief and learn how to make peace with that. Which is also related to imperfections. Here is a piece I have written inspired by Japanese philosophy


You probably heard of kintsugi before. It helps to explore the depth behind works and attempt to apply it in your own life.

Seeking happiness to soon can lead to disappointment.
Firstly let happiness find you.

I forget about them sometimes but they always sneak up again eventually.

@Justmeraeagain 🤔easier said than done but the world is full of disappointment and you have too pick yourself up dust yourself off and put it down too experience and move on

Looking for the answers too