KaiserSolze · 46-50, F
Your biological mother is your adopted older sister but you don't know where she is?
WishfulCreations · 26-30, F
@KaiserSolze She used to live five minutes away from me but she's moved to another area now to live as a single parent. Where that is, I don't know. Nobody knows. She just went one day.
MikeSp · 56-60, M
In cases like this, always speak with a lawyer first. They can save you lots of time. See a family attorney that specializes in adoptions. Most will give you a free 30 minute consultation. Even if you don't hire him/her, you will learn some things. By speaking with them first, they will be able to get records from anywhere if they are available. They know the bureaucrats that fobbed you off and they respect attornys. As you found out, some don't respect the citizenry and will waste your time until you give up. Good luck.
I think it's great that you want to ask your birth-mother for the answers.
It is possible that she didn't have a professional nurse help to establish breast-feeding - often tricky with first time mothers.
Or it's possible that she got a shock when you were born, discovering that mothering responsibilities were harder than she could cope with. Some people are still not mature at 18-21.
Or she may have had post-natal depression.
I would try going to the social services office in person. It makes it much harder for them to fob you off.
I think a lawyer might be too expensive and probably not necessary at this stage.
You could try a commercial service like http://www.omnitrace.com/birth-family/
If you know where your birth mother lives, you could pick a company that operates in the same state.
It is possible that she didn't have a professional nurse help to establish breast-feeding - often tricky with first time mothers.
Or it's possible that she got a shock when you were born, discovering that mothering responsibilities were harder than she could cope with. Some people are still not mature at 18-21.
Or she may have had post-natal depression.
I would try going to the social services office in person. It makes it much harder for them to fob you off.
I think a lawyer might be too expensive and probably not necessary at this stage.
You could try a commercial service like http://www.omnitrace.com/birth-family/
If you know where your birth mother lives, you could pick a company that operates in the same state.
Ynotisay · M
I'm not sure what a lawyer could do as there doesn't seem to be a legal component to this. They may be able to assist in sharing the laws around contact with a biological parent though. I would think accessing medical records would be covered under some type of law.
But just to toss this out there, her decision had nothing to do with you as a person. It was about a child that she realized she couldn't raise or was in a place where it was in your best interest to have a different situation. You had nothing to do with it.
Good luck.
But just to toss this out there, her decision had nothing to do with you as a person. It was about a child that she realized she couldn't raise or was in a place where it was in your best interest to have a different situation. You had nothing to do with it.
Good luck.
WishfulCreations · 26-30, F
@Ynotisay I get that, and she did tell a lawyer one time that she gave me away because she knew I would be looked after well, but she went and got pregnant with another child a year later. She currently has four kids, five including me.
Ynotisay · M
@WishfulCreations Well, if that's the case I'm pretty certain that she's felt an enormous amount of pain and guilt over the years. Maybe she's at a place where she can't face herself. You're clearly a sharp person so I'm thinking it might have worked out in your best interest.
Good luck with it.
Good luck with it.
jenmil · 26-30, F
From what I know in most cases the mother gave up the baby because she wanted s better life for it than she could give
Ajz59852 · 36-40, M
Speak to a lawyer