How old were you when you lost your virginity?

@exexec This is the dream.
Except I'm 24 now.
I expect it probably won't happen. If it ever does it'll probably beyond age 25 or 26. Or, terrifyingly, maybe not til my 30s.
Fuck.
My best years spent waiting for no one.

@zeframcochrane Hang in there. Most young ladies I know are waiting until 30 or so before finding the right man.

@exexec Holy fuck what country is this? Sounds lovely.
Although tbh my ideal partner would actually know what she's doing. Which is ironic since...

Fuck actually you'd probably be the perfect guy to ask this question to, how did you do it?
How did you deal with knowing she'd slept around before you?
I've had plenty of chances for casual encounters. But no one has ever wanted to stick around and actually be with me for ME. And that's what really hurts and is what I actually want and have held out for, I'm not some fleeting moment of dick in someone's life, I'm a person, a man, a boy once who wants to be seen as one.

When I end up with some lady (ideally my crush but probably not) I accepted years ago when I was 18 that she'll likely have fucked around and have a laundry list of partners versus me (I'm Canadian, here in North America women tend to have sex beginning at a median age of 15, same for men, so I'm an anomaly). And I'm okay with that because I only need one for life. At the same time...at 24, it gets to you. And I realize now that it's more likely my partner will have had MANY before me and likely even a kid or two.
I'm still okay with that.
But at the same time...I'm not. Like knowing that she didn't wait for me the same way I did for her. Will just always feel like she'll never love me the same way and will love me less.
And I'll always feel like number two. I'll always think about how when I was getting picked on in HS and called "grease" for my bad acne or just going unnoticed in Uni, she was probably screwing around enjoying herself and it'll hurt to know that and have to think about it.

How the fuck did you move past that?
Tell me it goes away when you meet her.

It's especially bad now. I've always held the notion of "where was she when I was a boy when I was all alone and needed her most?" but now I'm actually beginning to go somewhere.
That kid who was called "grease" by girls for his bad acne is actually beginning to have a budding singing and modelling career ahead and once that takes off...how the hell do I trust someone who comes along?
My pool drops to women I already know and feel comfortable with and even them I don't fully trust to like me.

How'd you do it?

@zeframcochrane We started dating when we were 15 and married at 22 when she graduated from college and I was in grad school. I only saw her once or twice a month in college, so she was free to date other guys. I knew she was fooling around, but I didn't know she was actually having sex with them until she told me after we were married a couple of years. So it wasn't a problem of knowing she had been fucked, although I had been told she had sex with a neighbor boy when she was 14. We became engaged her junior year, and there was no more dating others after that. I didn't like the fact that other guys might have been getting her naked, fingering her, leaving hickeys on her tits, but I knew she loved me. It was never a problem when she told me about having sex with them.

@exexec There was never a single doubt where you were like "she had sex with these guys while I waited, maybe she doesn't love me that much?".

@zeframcochrane @zeframcochrane Not a doubt. She always dumped the guys if they started trying to get her to break up with me. She broke dates with them to go out with me. It was just sex, an expected activity in the college dating scene.

@exexec Heh, guess I can't wrap my head around someone going for something casual with other guys when they like another guy.
Why didn't you join the expected activity in the dating scene?

@zeframcochrane I promised her that I loved her too much to do anything that might hurt her, including risking getting her pregnant. Several friends made that mistake with their girl friends. I had plenty of fun with her, just not sexual intercourse, and I didn't know for sure she was doing it with others.

@exexec Wow. 22-year-old you was way more secure than 24-year-old me.
If I was dating a girl and she went and slept around I don't know that I'd be able to hold onto her.
Fuck I'm just getting to know an awesome girl right now who's 22 and she's been around the block and whenever she talks about how many guys she's fucked I can't help but think "so provided this ever went anywhere I'd be number 2..3...5...7."
I think I'm probably around number 8 or 9. Can't get that thought out of my head that like, well, she'll never love me the way I do her. 'Cause she's it for me, she has every part of me, only woman.
But...there was a guy that "planted his flag" before me so it's not nearly as special.

On the plus side...that thought comes hand-in-hand with the following thought: "God she's going to know how to give amazing head".

@zeframcochrane Practice makes perfect!