Question for married people?

Life has a way of going into random play. Children tend to move into the priority zone, along with work, bills, and emergency situations. You gotta go with the flow, and just make sure you give your partner that special time when possible.

I would never even want to be married to a man who would expect me to put my kids ahead of him and I am mature enough to know that I’m unless I’m dying his work comes first. Anybody who needed my undivided attention and was needy like that wouldn’t make it past dating let alone marriage. Who gets my attention is based on availability and crisis level 😉.

Spouses are supposed to be one another's TOP priority, but if missing that work meeting means husband is going to lose his job (and therefore not be able to support the family), the wife should understand that and the husband should go to work.

As far as kids go, both spouses have a responsibility to support the children financially and emotionally, but if you make the kids a priority over one another (like ignoring your spouse's needs because you're busy waiting hand and foot on your kids when they are at an age where they can do those things for themselves), that's wrong and your marriage will probably fall apart.

All of this should be common sense but I see sooooo many people making all the wrong choices in their marriages.

Part of the traditional marriage vows/ceremony is "Let nothing come between you". I believe in that whole heartedly. We do not have children, but that even includes them. Hear me out...The needs, welfare, and raising/training of the kids is a very important and necessary responsibility and in no way should be neglected, but the kids will grow up and leave making lives of their own. When that happens, if the parents have devoted all of their time and energy to the kids and not any to each other then what do they have when the nest is empty? Nothing. It is not uncommon for couples to divorce once the kids are gone because they have no real relationship anymore...they've "grown apart". The same could be said for work as well. Of course in an ideal world a person should be able to put work aside every time their spouse needs or wants them but in reality that is impossible. That doesn't mean that your spouse can't still be your main priority or your family either. Some places you work are pretty understanding about certain things when it comes to prioritizing one's spouse/family, but more and more are not and your job is your livelihood (the necessary means by which you provide for said family) and cannot be risked losing. A strong couple with a good relationship knows/understands this and works with it.

Here's, the thing, in this day and age, very few people believe in the sanctity of marriage. And those that do can't stay married. So it does not matter if you give one another devotion. I've only known 1 couple in my life that has gone the distance. Just 1. I hate to sound like a douche, but to many people only care about themselves. So to answer your question, it will very rarely ever work unless each one only cares about the others happiness. Sorry to ramble on.

Those example sound like needy people, unless those situations are due to actual emergencies.

You lost me with bith.

Oh hell naw, that would be TOO much attention.

you should be happy without that

Giving someone top priority and being foolish are 2 different things. If you get fired because you stayed home when you should go to work in order to attend to your wife you will not be happy because now you will have additional problems that involve not being able to take care of your wife. You must think the important thing is to have a partner who is on the same page with what is important.