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What's your thoughts on Jealousy in a relationship?

Jealousy, good or bad?
There's many forms of jealousy, some view it as cute and endearing while others toxic and unattractive.
SW-User
It depends on the level of jealousy but it can be normal as long as it doesn't turn into a control issue.
DearAmbellina2113 · 41-45, F
Some jealousy is natural unless you feel absolutely no attachment to the person at all. I don't go overboard with it (my husband is welcome to have female friends, watch porn, and check out other women)- as long as he doesn't act on his attractions. I'd be freaked out if someone didn't get at least a little jealous when there was a possible threat of their partner being more attracted to someone else.
Lostpoet · M
Good. You can't be jealous if you aren't afraid to lose someone.
Depends. There's a sliding scale.

A smothering, controlling, micro-managing jealousy is horrible.

A 'I could care less' form of jealousy is like 'why are we even in this relationship?'
DearAmbellina2113 · 41-45, F
@VeronicaJane Exactly.
gmatthewb · 51-55, M
I think if you're jealous, you might be in the wrong relationship. I don't feel there should be any jealousy in a relationship since you should be sharing everything.
SailorMarz · F
Jealousy is normal. It's only bad whenever it comes to the point that your SO is telling you who you can and can't talk to.
Ellen · 46-50, F
@SailorMarz Perfectly put.
NaturalBeautyQueen · 41-45, F
I think it all depends. Some forms of jealousy can lead to control issues.
Hdryder555 · 61-69, M
Nothing kills a relationship faster than jealousy
SW-User
eh shows you're insecure and doubt what the two of you have. a little bit is fine, but when it effects relationship then... yikes.
Fernie · F
there is no level or form of jealousy that isn't toxic...no matter how someone describes it
ABCDEF7 · M
I don't think there should be any place of jealousy in your life. It will hurt you more than others.
abe182 · 46-50, M
Jealousy is a selfish emotion void of any love for another. Best to lose your insecurities.
Hdryder555 · 61-69, M
Jealousy comes from insecurity
ViciDraco · 36-40, M
It's neither really. It is a natural emotion and we need to learn to own and manage it. Our jealousy is our own problem, not our partner's or anyone else's.
Fernie · F
@ViciDracoI didn't like that whole paragraph. I don't think it's natural. It comes from insecurity which comes from life experiences and lousy role models. People loaded with self esteem and don't struggle with insecurity do not feel jealousy.
ViciDraco · 36-40, M
@Fernie perhaps I just haven't met people like that to witness it so my view has been colored by life experience.
Fernie · F
@ViciDraco Perhaps, as is true for so many of us, you haven't experienced real, pure love yet....you just think you do.
As others have said, it depends on the level. Jealousy is the fear of losing what you consider “yours”. If you basically trust your partner’s love, it shouldn’t be an issue.

 
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