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If you are married, or have been married (even if you're not now), why did you get married?

Was the decision fully mutual 100 percent without reservations or expectations, and could you feel you could 100 percent trust the other person to see it the same way?

How has (or did) it pan out over time in reality?

Good? Bad? Ugly? Indifferent? Toxic? Dangerous?

If you've been married and aren't now, did you break up amicably, or badly? Did you get screwed over by your ex trying to destroy your life and get all your money, house, etc. and brainwash your kids to hate you? I know from experience that breakups just involving children are not always pleasant and are rarely an overly positive situation.

Anecdotally it seems men always fare worse in breakups that women, as the 'system' skews in favour of of women to almost be default make out that they are the 'victim' and men are the intigators/perpetrators of everything that causes relationships to break down.
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We had been dating a year and I figured—correctly as it turns out—no one else is likely to put up with me that long. So I asked and she said yes. It’s worked out but there were —and remain —issues. The happily ever after fairy tale marriage is fiction and not reality from my perspective. But I’m still better off than I would ever have been or will be.
exexec · 70-79, C
We started dating at 15 and our love developed and deepened each year for almost eight years. We could not imagine life without each other, so we married at 22. We still love each other after being together over 50 years, dating and married.
MoveAlong · 70-79, M
Money and standing. I was a trophy husband and a social climber. I'm now a wealthy, highly respected widower. 😁
lissah · 36-40, F
I was in love but both times they weren't.
zonavar68 · 56-60, M
@lissah I doubt that in any relationship the dimensions of love are perfectly aligned and mutual. I also doubt I'd ever be in a situation to try and explore what a true mutually aligned love connection is actually like. It's like trying to find the ultimate unicorn.
lissah · 36-40, F
@zonavar68 well i assume that when you get married or getting married you shouldn't be screwing anything with legs. My first ex couldn't keep his pants zipped even tho we had sex all the time. And my last ex screwed up at his bachelor party so needless to say that marriage lasted as long as it took me to blow all his money on our honeymoon in Vegas. When we came home i filed for divorce immediately.
zonavar68 · 56-60, M
@lissah Sorry to read about that. I'm the opposite I find sex scary and I'm 56.
WoWgirll · 36-40, F
Lilliesandlight · 41-45, F
I got knocked up at 17
Strictmichael75 · 61-69, M
Lilliesandlight · 41-45, F
@Strictmichael75 so that's why i got married.
Ferise1 · 46-50, M
We were both in love and it was fantastic for 18 years. We had a few bad fights but after awhile we stopped fighting and there was just love. We broke up very amicably., we still wrote every day and said that we loved each other and she picked me up twice a week.

 
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