Only logged in members can reply and interact with the post.
Join SimilarWorlds for FREE »

I Have a Question

So I was just talking with my friend that's a guy. We were talking about his dating life and he was saying how he wants a girl that's younger than him...like in her 20s. He's in his 50s. Well okay nothing wrong with liking younger women. Like more power to you.

So then he told me he wants to marry and have kids with this younger girl. I said okay but also told him that he's most likely going to find that in someone who's older...like 30+. He got pissed because I said that.

So let me ask you guys this: Isn't he MOST LIKELY (key word) to find someone who's older that wants the things he wants? A family, marriage, maturity. It's very rare that a 20 something year old wants all of that responsibility. They wanna have fun. Experience life. Not be tied down.
Top | New | Old
firefall · 61-69, M
Honestly, I don't think he's most likely to find that with an older (30s age) woman, because they are more likely to be aware of his flaws & drawbacks, from bitter experience usually, and more likely to be self-assertive and wanting their own goals.
.
There are plenty of 20ish girls who mostly want to get married and have kids, and look for or expect the implicit power imbalance (in exchange for being supported): the urge for fun, experience, and not being tied down in your 20s seems to link fairly strongly with the privilege with which someone is brought up (if you get raised in a relatively stable upper-middle class household, you are much more likely to value independance, experiences, fun; if you get raised in a working poor household, security and stability will often be more appealing at that point in your life).
frostyflower · 36-40, F
Yes, especially these days, most women want a career and a few years of marriage before even considering having kids. My husband is only 6 years older than me, and his clock was ticking way too early. It used to be a big fight for us every few months. I said I wasn't ready yet, and he always took it as me never wanting kids. Now we have one awesome little girl and we don't fight about it anymore, but we were married 7 years before I was willing to try.
frostyflower · 36-40, F
Good points Firefall, though with all that in mind, the guy should be looking at high school graduates. 18-19, otherwise those girl will already be married when they're in their 20's.
CheshireCatalyst · 41-45, M
There are people of both genders who are attracted to the idea of skipping out all the work in life and marrying someone who is older and has their life, finances and career in order.

Think of it like moving into a fully furnished house, I wouldn't want to, I like having my own personal touches everywhere, but it appeals to other people.
Amanda756 · 31-35, F
You've already established that. Forget that he might possibly have a crush on me (I actually think he does) but isn't an older guy in general most likely to find these qualities in an older woman?
wunderluv · 51-55, M
I absolutely agree .. He may find a single that would marry and give hive a. Few kids but he will have her 1 or 2 or .. .??
HatsOnFrogs · 26-30, M
Exactly. Baby fever doesn't really kick in much when you're in your twenties. There are some women who want that, but a larger percentage when they're older.
ajsk13 · 51-55, M
He's fishing to see if your interested
Goralski · 56-60, M
He's trying to give you a hint
Amanda756 · 31-35, F
He knows I'm taken
HatsOnFrogs · 26-30, M
Good points sure, but really kind of creepy when you think about it. 'Yeah, the girls with no experience would be better cos that can't see the problems! They're cool to impregnate!' :p
firefall · 61-69, M
@DickValentine - absolutely, very creepy & manipulative indeed: I didnt mean to imply any approbation of this behaviour* just observing about it.

* and in fact, it seems a guaranteed route to a sad and broken life, because as the woman gets older and realises how she's been exploited, she'll leave, and there is a limited number of times you can get away with this before you are in the creepy old man at the rest home territory.
Goralski · 56-60, M

 
Post Comment