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If you want to make plans with someone...

Do you:

Speak with them about it in advance, with enough time to take off work and book things?

Or do you tell them you have off next week and give them a bunch of options that they can't even be a part of because they were blindsided and it's too late for them to take off work?

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Akimbo75 · 46-50, F

I kind a feel like option 2 happened to you… and it was quite rude of them to do that.

MarbleMarvel

@Akimbo75 Yup. I'm 100% looking for validation on this one lol then they got mad at me for feeling left out. I'm just blown away.

Justafantasy · M

Depends on the plan. A few hour after work event, a week should be adequate. Can figure out what works for all. A week event needs a few months notice

MarbleMarvel

@Justafantasy if you wanted to make overnight plans that required the other person knowing in advance so they could get off work?

Jeephikelove · 51-55, F

If travel has to be involved then always talk it out in advance.

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Jeephikelove · 51-55, F

@MarbleMarvel exactly! Men. 🙄

MarbleMarvel

@Jeephikelove I'm lost lol He said, I'm a man, I shut down... Ummm okay but how do you not do that so we can make plans...

Jeephikelove · 51-55, F

@MarbleMarvel communication is not their strong suit, especially if they have more flexibility with their jobs and have someone quick on hand to watch their kid.

Monday40 · 51-55, F

I always do the first thing because I have to work things out on my end.

The second thing is inexcusable in my opinion and I would erased that person from my life.

MarbleMarvel

@Monday40 can you imagine someone laying option two on you then getting mad at you for feeling left out... Like I tried to tell them I can't do last minute plans, gotta job and a kid... And explained it hurts to only make last minute plans that I can't do...

Monday40 · 51-55, F

@MarbleMarvel You are in the right 💯. The same thing is happening with me right now. I understand that you can’t do a lot of things that require advance notice. I don’t understand why they don’t see that! If that’s the way they want to be then I think I would dump them fast.

ineedadrink · 51-55, M

Umm, the first choice is optimal.

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ineedadrink · 51-55, M

@MarbleMarvel People know what right behavior is but choose to ignore it.

MarbleMarvel

@ineedadrink then get mad at you when you call them on it?

ineedadrink · 51-55, M

@MarbleMarvel Ain't no one likes getting told they've done wrong when they know you are in the right.

Blondily · F

Yes its like having to go thru national security just to get together with my daughter. Frustrating...

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MarbleMarvel

@GeistInTheMachine how would you feel if someone pulled option two on you?

GeistInTheMachine · 31-35, M

@MarbleMarvel Option two is why I don't talk to people in the first place, unfortunately. And my family is like that. All, I'll be there for you, I'll help you out in a storm... But when I was close to being homeless it was crickets.

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