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I Am Depressed

I'm in a terrible place right now. Suicide seems like the best option the more it invades my mind and the more I dwell on my life. I have nobody to talk to and a boyfriend who is too good to be brought down by me. It breaks my heart knowing he's settling. I know he's the one and he loves me too but I find myself wanting to leave him so he has a better life. It would make suicide easier. Only I do not want to die. I want a future with this man and I want my life to be in a better place. Everything just seems so hopeless when treatments won't work and it begins to affect all areas of your life. I wish I wasn't broken and I wish I could be a better me.
Lonelyandyb · 36-40, M
I go to that place sometimes and I know its fucking hard.You have a Boyfriend(which is one up on me,Never had a girlfriend),Who you love, why not talk to him about this? tell him how you feel? If he is a dick about it,hes probably not the one. please seek some help. Don't kill yourself please!!
SW-User
whats been making you feel down
SW-User
i was heavily bullied growing up. so that was hard to let go of when people are so cruel to you. it ruins your mindset.
Ginkofishin · 26-30, F
@SW-User Grew up with abusive parents myself, and was the outcast until high school. I was lucky enough to not be bullied at school too bad but home was never safe. I understand your pain. I'm still trying to reprogram my brain from thinking I'm stupid and should be ashamed after I fail even the smallest task.
SW-User
my home life my parents never got along.. grew up in a house where my parents were constantly screaming at each other. almost divorced 6 times

 
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