The avoidant and anxious attachment style?
Yeah... I'm going down that rabbit hole again, lol
I will admit that I have a very surface level understanding of this...
But from what I do understand, and also observe, is a lot of people comparing avoidants to narcissists, which kinda doesn't make sense?
Or at least, it doesn't make sense to me, anyway
Narcs love validation and admiration and believe that they deserve it, avoidants might appreciate the attention and it might make them feel valued for like 5 seconds but the novelty will wear off and they'll just take it as others being polite because it's just something people do and validation =/= sincerity.
And too much attentions gets weird for them.
and people seem to be pinning avoidants as the bad guys and anxious attachments as the good guys,
but think about it, avoidants are terrified of being controlled, especially by narcs.
narcissists are terrified of not being able to control others, and narcs are well known to do this thing called "love bombing"
naturally, wouldn't this scare the crap out of an avoidant? even if the anxious attachment is well meaning, couldn't it easily be mistaken for a narcs love bombing or persistent persuasion?
I will admit that I have a very surface level understanding of this...
But from what I do understand, and also observe, is a lot of people comparing avoidants to narcissists, which kinda doesn't make sense?
Or at least, it doesn't make sense to me, anyway
Narcs love validation and admiration and believe that they deserve it, avoidants might appreciate the attention and it might make them feel valued for like 5 seconds but the novelty will wear off and they'll just take it as others being polite because it's just something people do and validation =/= sincerity.
And too much attentions gets weird for them.
and people seem to be pinning avoidants as the bad guys and anxious attachments as the good guys,
but think about it, avoidants are terrified of being controlled, especially by narcs.
narcissists are terrified of not being able to control others, and narcs are well known to do this thing called "love bombing"
naturally, wouldn't this scare the crap out of an avoidant? even if the anxious attachment is well meaning, couldn't it easily be mistaken for a narcs love bombing or persistent persuasion?
