How do you decide which people you let in your life?

Choose people that will enhance your life. People who are positive, supportive, loving, and not fault finding of others. No gossipers. People who look for the good in life. People who are good to others and want to help others. Not people who get a charge out of somehow bringing you down just because they are down. I think you know what I mean. People who are overdramatic in that way. People who love drama. Don't hang around those type. And not people who are always judgmental of others and can find no good in them but constantly talk bad about them. Mainly take care of yourself and put yourself first. Never allow anyone to put you down or control you. You just stay away from toxic people and you'll do well. A good friend will have your best interest at heart. They will be happy for you and not jealous.

If they are manipulators, don’t respect boundaries, are toxic, users, disappear or make excuses when you need help after you’ve helped them, etc. those are pretty good ways to make that decision. I only wish I’d not been so lenient in my younger years by tolerating so much. I made excuses for some of them and shouldn’t have.

You actually don't get that luxury if you're the right type of man you just hang on to whatever value for however long you can stand it and throw back the problem ones you usually know quick not to get tangled up with.

A high quality individual is always going to have a long list of people that profess friendship and many will just be single event users.

Long term trust and a mutual ability to identify and get past an erroneous perceived wrong isn't easy to sift out from even a small crowd. And it can be really infuriating that we all have a limited time on the planet when you lose one to the inevitable.

But that's always the missing key isn't it? Always remember that someday people are either going to be -at your funeral. Some might even be celebrating or crying. For them who forgets may he also be forgotten.

I won't mind having a lonely funeral if the alternative is having a bunch of lively s.o.b.s scanning the parlor for an heir to fleece. That's life kiddo. You might think a few times you found a gem. 20/20 hindsight may teach you there was really only one and you blew it. Or they caught the last boat off the planet unceremoniously and you never even realized you lost the only real friend you ever had.

Now you tell me that heaven is a place on earth and I'll tell you not to make too firm a reservation. You might waste the dues on a ticket you should have refused.

Note that your mileage may vary.

I haven't found anyone I'm willing to let in yet, be it friendship or love. I like to think for friendship some shared bond or ability to communicate on some subject. As to love, that's tough. It would have to be someone I would want to take hiking with me, or go visit places, but that seems somewhat shallow as that's me oriented. I don't know what she would want as I don't know her. So it would have to be someone willing to do my half while I'd be open to her half, whatever it is. And I just have no freaken clue as to how to determine that in advance.

They work their way in. I let the circle ecosystem weed itself out.

@RVLPreborn I feel the same as you and Magenta. The Cherokee lady seems too bitter about something to talk rationally abobut relationships.

If I consistently feel safe and comfortable around them, they are worth having in my life.

I watch them and let them say it do whatever they want. That’s how they reveal their true self. Depending on their actions and what comes out of their mouth I decide if they get an entry or not. Till that point I don’t share or say anything to them.

People come into my life and I will let them if the are decent. I steer away from drugs and alcohol. My best friend is a double amputee of the legs. We have talked for hours in those hours we have found trust and a deep friendship.

I don't.

i have friends now that have turned out to be toxic..one sided, selfish etc. i am even distancing from family who have problems.

I get to know people before I start hanging out with them and connect on a friendship level. This helps me weed out the ones I know are not compatible with me.

I kind of don't..
I can talk to people but I prefer to keep them at arms length

very slowly
inch by inch, each layer of closeness take a long time to get thru

Their tiddy to waistline ratio.

Hi :) I want to ask something but dont want to ask it publicly so anyone can see coz some people might make fun of me. Would appreciate it if youll send me a message so i can replay you with my question (coz for some reason i can't message first). Thanx :)

one by one.

@RVLPreborn 🤔i think you need too work people out too how they tick obviously if they are toxic there is no place in your world for that sort

Buy a Pistol

If I not blocked them long ago then we became friends

I step back and observe them.