How do you decide which people you let in your life?

@NativePortlander1970 yes it’s wise to detach emotionally and do that. Something I’ve learned this year with my health issues is that those who know and don’t reach out to at least say hi every few months weren’t really a friend. I have had one friend who seems to turn on people once they get seriously ill. I’ve seen it with others and thought she was stressed out with her own problems with others that she had known for many years. It was the attitude that got me about that

@cherokeepatti My late ex fiancee's Godly Uber Super Pious Extremist xtian little sister is very prejudiced against illness and disabilities, she treated Jane horribly.

@NativePortlander1970 that’s horrible isn’t it? As though she’ll never get sick herself and need a word or two of encouragement.

@NativePortlander1970 One afternoon I was working at the store and this friend that I mentioned previously was working on the other door. A customer came to me, he was the husband of a woman that both of us had worked with at another job and for many years. He started telling me that his wife had come down with a bad case of shingles and was bed-ridden. I gave him my condolences. I knew she had been taking care of her father-in-law, who had dementia, and was probably extremely stressed out and worn-down by it. Had seen her a few times in the store since I started working there. But her husband also added he told the other greeter who I mentioned and she had snapped at him “I have enough of my own problems, don’t have time to worry about anyone else.” That was a hot clue to me about her lack of empathy for those who could do nothing for her. I always talked to her for lengthy periods of time anytime she’d call me up after I retired and tell me her problems at work or whatever. But she never wants to even talk or offer a word of sympathy when she finds out someone she’s known long-term is sick or whatever.

@cherokeepatti And they wonder why they really don't have any friends

@NativePortlander1970 Here’s something else. They went to Canada for a wedding and her husband got sick at the wedding. Had to go to the hospital where he was hospitalized for several days. When he got well enough that they could drive back home she called up people and told them. She was focusing so much on how much it was going to cost instead of on her husband surviving etc. It got under my skin. But she told off on herself to me, saying her neighbor and friend had got into the middle of her and chewed her out for that saying he could have died, which is true so she came down off of that attitude. Her husband has been so good to her and she has been focused so much on getting luxury cars and jewelry. Not saying she’s lazy, she worked two jobs and so did he. But that damned attitude towards someone who is so seriously ill.

@NativePortlander1970 Hi :) I want to ask something but dont want to ask it publicly so anyone can see coz some people might make fun of me. Would appreciate it if youll send me a message so i can replay you with my question (coz for some reason i can't message first). Thanx :)