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What’s the point of living?

I just don’t see life as worth living. I will be 26 in a few days, and yes I see that everyone struggles and even feels the same exact way that I feel. But idk, I just feel like I can’t do it. I still live with my mom annd me annd her anre constantly clashing and some days I just feel very depressed and anxious. I would really love nothing more than to leave but Im just not sure if I can manage life on my own. Nowadays they want you to make 3x what they charge for rent, and im just so tired at this point in my life and I barely even have bills to pay. I don’t understand how people manage and survive all this. I just feel like im amongst the weak. I can’t do this life. I really don’t want to. Im weighing the choices of continuing living this life or just ending it early and finally being at peace. Death sounds so much better than continuing to live in this system. It’s just come to a point where I hate everything. I love my parents, but I hate them for bringing me here and barely knowing what to do with me. I low key hate God for having a part in this. Im not grateful for life no matter how much I try to remind myself that I have shelter. I hate myself. There feels like theres no point in my existence. I will literally kill myself if I have children and see any part of myself in them. I don’t see a family tree extending from me at all. I just hate all of this and don’t see a point. I try so hard to tell myself other people go through this, and even worse. But I’m just at a point where I dont want to be alive anymore, I just don’t want to do this. Does anyone have any advice?
Luckylu · 61-69, F
Basically, you are the only one who can choose. Either spend your life just as you are, change your life, your attitude into what you desire, learn who you really are, or give up. Giving up is always an option but if you give up and end it there are no more options and can you do it without thoroughly fucking it up and leaving yourself a physical mess that you cannot change? Why not get over yourself and explore this world? Find what lights you up like a Christmas tree in the middle of the night? If you are avoiding who you are because you think no one will like that person well get over it. Avoiding who you really are will cause you misery no matter what. Embrace who you are, learn to love yourself and bring into your life those things that give you joy. Spend this life learning to be the best person you can be for yourself and your life will follow and be the best it can be for you. It took me 40 years to learn this don’t be like me and wait so long.
Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@Luckylu thank you, the positivity is very uplifting. And it’s true it’s all my decision, I do tell myself that if I kill myself now that I won’t get to enjoy the things I used to like watching the sun rise. My mind just feel so hazy. But you’re right.
Matt85 · 36-40, M
To find Christ. ✝️
Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@Matt85 Amen, brother. I can’t help but feel like a mess right now and like my faith is broken up but hey such is life.
riseofthemachine · 41-45, M
Edashh I'm not being harsh on you now .
Do you know what your caught up in .
Self pity . When you get like that you find fault with everything .
I've been on the same both .
My only advice to you is try snap out of it cause you could end up in a pysche ward if it continues for so long . All it is is self pity .
Of course if your under the same roof with a person after so long they'd be clashes .
Then when your on your own . You'd find a fault then 😆😆😆.
Do you ever hear the sane the grass is greener on the other side ?
Well I tell you a story about me .
Me and my ex were always clashing towards the end of relationship. I mean insanity clashes .
She decided we leave the country. I said yes to please her cause at this stage I was trying to make it right , so was she .
We moved to Hong Kong.18 hour flight away from home . We were supposed to go to Australia for a year . We landed in Hong Kong. Lasted there 5 days . Never got to Australia. We had to come back cause I ended up getting a nervous breakdown over there . I lost $3500 over there .
A few weeks later the relationship ended . I wasn't right for a year and half . I ended up in a pysche ward first time for 3 day , second time for 6 weeks third time for a week , all in the space of a year .
The story I'm trying to tell you is count your lucky blessing where you are cause all of the suffering I was suffering from was grief and self pity mixed into one .
You have to be happy from the inside .
I was 29 . I'm 43 and still around .
See the biggest trick in the mind and what the mind would tell you is that everyone is having a great time except for me and if that goes deeper then suicide thoughts comes in ,
When there actually nothing happening.
I hope I came across to you 🙂.
There's no need to end lives
Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@riseofthemachine I don’t find this harsh at all, this comment has genuinely given me a lot to think about and has been replaying in my head since I read it. My next question is, how do I get out of this vicious cycle of self pity and self loathing?
riseofthemachine · 41-45, M
@Edashh2399 the only way to get out of self pity and self loathing is prayer .
I'm not religious mad but after my experience that I had and I had a fairly rough one and you think my experience I had would make me resent God but I got closer to him than I ever did in my life through the toughest times of my life and it was prayer .
See if you try to fix yourself you ended up getting frustrated but when resentments come in which they will , don't answer the thought .
You'll know there resentments cause the name of the voice will be running through your head .
That's what starts the self loathing and I'm sorry I said self pity I was wrong there cause if you went through a lot that could be depression .
Self pity and depression are very similar emotions. Like resentments and self loathing are very similar .
All I can say is pray if you believe in prayer .
It worked for up to now , and that doesn't mean your free from pain . It means you can handle it a bit better . It brings you solitude.
You won't get this in one day .
It took me 22 years to get this where I am .
I'm sober and clean 19 years and between me and U I didn't have to do much work to get sober .
All I had to do was bring the shuffle to dig up stuff that was blocking me from God or if you don't believe in God (a higher power)
See when you have a head full of crap how are you expected to see .
That's mainly where the self loathing comes in cause you feel trapped in spirit .
You can do it
I know it sounds ridiculous, but its true that: it is always darkest before the dawn. Whether you believe it or not, Life will get better. How fast depends on YOU!
Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@Guardian people say that and I try to believe it, but when I see some people’s situation sometimes it looks like things just get worse and worse until that person is no more. Sometimes I wonder if my life is doomed in that way.. it makes stuff like that very hard to believe. I will definitely hold on to this saying tho, I needed to hear it
ABCDEF7 · M
You don't know from where you came, and you don't know where you will go after death. Will that place be better from your current circumstances?, would it give you options to improve your circumstances there?

At least you know you have a hope & possibility to improve your circumstances here. First of all you have to learn to live with positivity & happiness. Positivity doesn't require you to live in good circumstances, it means you are positive for the your past, present & future, irrespective of your past experiences, current circumstances.

Similarly, happiness is an internal situation. Someone can be happy in the worst circumstances, and vice versa. The happiest people don't have the best things in their lives, but they appreciate what they have. Learning to live joyfully with things you do not like is a huge lesson in life.

To create an outside situation you need the cooperation of other people & forces. To create an inner situation you only need yourself.

Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@ABCDEF7 if I’m being completely honest, I think I will end up in hell if I die now, that’s part of the reason I’m so scared to actually it.

I needed to hear wisdom, and this most certainly did it for me. Do you have any advice on how I can stay happy even though I feel like I’m in the middle of the worst situation right now?
Thank you for taking the time to write this by the way.
ABCDEF7 · M
@Edashh2399 Well, I personally believe that there is no such place as hell or heaven. Hell & heaven is what you make your life here on this earth. You don't know if you are making a hell out of heaven here by mentally torturing yourself just with your approach towards life. I do believe in reincarnation, but that's a different philosophy.

First thing is don't make circumstances worst in your mind. I bet there can be worst circumstances than you are facing right now. Always see the things as they are. Looking things in a pessimist way makes you depressed, on the other hand looking things in optimistic way makes you hallucinate. Both are not good for you.

"Action is a great restorer and builder of confidence. Inaction is not only the result, but the cause, of fear. Perhaps the action you take will be successful; perhaps different action or adjustments will have to follow. But any action is better than no action at all." – Norman Vincent Peale

Do whatever best you can do to improve the circumstances. You should find satisfaction & happiness in whatever action you are doing because that is what is in your hands. Don't try to find happiness in the outcome of your actions because it involves external forces which are not in your hands.

Tough times never last, but Tough People do !

Best Wishes. :)
ABCDEF7 · M
in10RjFox · M
I low key hate God for having a part in this.

Why bring god into this man-made world and man-made problems? You should be asking your manufacturers/producers, why they brought you in without being able to support you. But yes.. there are choices to end it or gift your life by adding it to someone.

Does anyone have any advice?
You are free to reach me to add your life and I can mentor and guide you for an exemplary living. But don't expect everything in a day, for I am no miracle man.
PinkRose23 · 22-25, F
Im so sorry youre hurting and while I wish I could make it all go away all you can do is just keep putting one foot in front of the other and lean on loved ones and NEVER give up!
Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@PinkRose23 thank you for your sympathy, I really appreciate it. You are right. I just kept wondering how long I can do that for. Most days I feel like I don’t have anyone to lean on. My mother wants me out. I feel intense pressure. I just have so much respect and admiration for people who do this on their own, especially if they have kids.
PinkRose23 · 22-25, F
@Edashh2399 That must be hard Im so sorry. PM me if you like hon. it might be easier to chat
Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@PinkRose23 of course ❤️
The struggle is the point. Decide what you want and take it when you can.
@Edashh2399 It’s not tough. You would defend someone else in trouble right? Well remember the little kid you used to be, and fight for them.
Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@LowBorn I will forever cherish what you just said🥹
@Edashh2399 I sincerely hope it helps. Look after that little kid. She’s the only one who will always be with you and there for you. So take care of her.
Nelladell · 80-89, F
Nope, everyone doesn't feel as you do. There truly are those who are quite satisfied. Can't speak for all, but it seems to me that the reason for happiness lies in knowing the answer to your question about the reason for living. It's Love; for self, for others, for life. It brings gratitude and purpose and joy. Truly

Peace.
deadgerbil · 26-30
To try to make the world a better place
If you don't care if you live or not. It seems to me you are in a perfect position to get crazy. You can face all your fears. Don't have a boyfriend? Get one. Afraid of heights? Go skydiving. Live life, see what it's really like.
Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@Pitchblue haha, yeah I like that response. I am in a perfect position to get wild, as I absolutely care about nothing atm. Not to like destroy myself, but yeah.
And honestly, I would need money to do a lot of things. That, I do not have and am very much struggling to obtain.
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akindheart · 61-69, F
I can assure you that life is worth living. It is not stressfree but worth it. i saw a podcast last night and it was about suffering makes us successful. you need suffering to succeed. completely contrary to what we might think but completely true.
Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@akindheart but what in your opinion makes you feel like life is worth living? Do you have children and all? I feel like I wouldn’t even see the beauty in life if I had a family..
and do you remember the name of that podcast?
HannibalMontanimal · 26-30, M
Have a drink.
Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@HannibalMontanimal or several haha
HannibalMontanimal · 26-30, M
@Edashh2399 it is Friday... 😉
Lostpoet · M
Do the things that you enjoy doing as often as you can.
Lostpoet · M
Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@Lostpoet thank you for taking time to respond ❤️
Lostpoet · M
@Edashh2399 You just have to keep doing them and eventually the pleasure will come back.
Fluffybull · F
Make an appointment with your doctor: you found v depressed. No, not everyone feels the same way you do.
Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@Fluffybull that’s what it feels, I just feel hopeless in a way I can’t explain. Thank you for helping me clarify
Fluffybull · F
@Edashh2399 There's nothing wrong in asking for help. If you find it difficult to explain to the doctor at your appointment, write down what you've posted here and show it to him/her. ❤️
Monalisaa1986 · 36-40, F
I comments you answer you don’t sound very depressed
Edashh2399 · 26-30, F
@Monalisaa1986 I’m trying not to be too negative, as much as I want to I understand people will not want to help or even talk to you if you’re not willing to hear their advice and are just whining and complaining. I’m genuinely looking for advice, I don’t just want pity or sympathy. Even though, the sympathy is nice as I don’t have that IRL

 
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