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I Love Jokes And Riddles

A Dog Called Sex - an oldie but goodie
Everybody who has a dog calls him "Rover" or "Boy".
I call my dog "Sex".
Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to get his license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex.
He said, "Id like to have one too."
Then I said, "But this is a dog."
He said I didn't care what she looked like.
Then I said, "You don't understand, Ive had Sex since I was 9 years old."
He said I must have been quite a kid.

When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the hotel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex.
He said that every room in the place was for sex.
I said, "You don't understand, Sex keeps me awake at night."
The Clerk said "Me too."

One day I entered Sex in a contest but before the competition began, the dog ran away.
Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex entered in the contest. He told me that I should have sold tickets.
"But you don't understand", I said, "I had hoped to have Sex on television." He called me a show-off.

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to file for custody of the dog.
I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I got married."
The judge said "Me too."
Then I told him that after I was married, Sex had left me.
He said, "Me too."

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked "What are you doing in this alley at 4 in the morning?"
I said, "I'm looking for Sex..."
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😂😂🤣🤣🤣!!

It reminds me of my experience in the bar.

I went in around 3:30pm and sat at the bar until almost 5, not being able to decide what I wanted to drink.

The bartender walked over and said, "Hey pal, I don't mind your sitting here so long as we're pretty empty. But it's almost happy hour, and people are going to start coming in. If you're not going to buy a drink, I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to leave.

I said, "Well, I just don't know what I'd like."

The bartender replied, "Why don't you try some tequila? It's one of the most popular liquors. Lots of people like it."

Without hesitation, "NO! OOOOOH, NO!!!. The last time I drank tequila I was blowin' chunks all night."

The bartender said, "Well man, just don't drink so much!"

I informed him, "No, you don't understand. Chunks is my dog."
Rusham · M
Omg lmao@PhoenixPhail
@Rusham 😂
Rusham · M