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What does it mean when your partner asks you this?

So you are having a hard time with your mental health and you feel you can’t talk with them. And things are quite tense. Then you tell them about the thoughts you are having and you end up in tears with their brutal words to you. Then they say “ be honest with me, do you want to be with someone else, is that why you are giving me a hard time?” But they see you are not in the right place mentally so why would you consider someone else?! .. is this a hint about them?
smiler2012 · 56-60
obviously this other person cannot see you have genuine issues and need sympathy and you are not using this as an excuse to break up [munchingspaghetti ]
Ryannnnnn · 31-35, M
Sometimes people are so wrapped up in their own emotions that they can't hear you.
So what I hear is insecurity on their part, that's not a fault, it just is what it is. It can feel accusatory or critical even if it comes from a place of hurt.

I would ask if he feels secure about your relationship and say you wanna make sure he's alright because it's important. He might tell you something that you weren't aware of.

Then you can say how you felt and that you feel you need some support and that you'd be really greatful if he could be there for you in that way. It's just trying to meet them on their level of understanding first so they don't feel clouded when you tell them.

Now that may not be the case, but it's highly likely and it's quite common. I speak from experience being on the other end of that and being the person you are in that situation.
Give that a try first.
Sweetpoison · 36-40, F
Some people are empaths and some are not, for some people it’s just impossible to understand what others are going through, even if you tell them.
Zeusdelight · 61-69, M
For him to say "is that why you are giving me a hard time?" indicates to me, he does not understand what is happening to you and thinks it is about him.

Mental illness can be perplexing to the sufferer and the partner.

I think you have to try to continue to communicate to him the difficulties and the fact that you are trying as hard as possible to cope with yourself and continue the relationship.
assemblingaknob · 26-30, F
No. It just means he can't understand your situation.
SW-User
No, he's just wondering about you. He feels a distance between you two which makes him feel uncomfortable. He's looking for reassurance
Forgetmeknot · 41-45
It sounds like to me that he's trying to put the attention and concern that you need onto himself by expressing insecurity and a hard time.

Because you're unwell you can't processes his need which sounds for the best if he is making your illness about him.

He's either really stupid or only cares about himself.
4meAndyou · F
If your partner is highly insensitive, and you are extremely sensitive, I think you are in a bad relationship. Highly insensitive partners are never going to be someone you can talk to about your feelings.

If your partner sees your attempts to talk as "giving them a hard time", then maybe the writing is on the wall.
Montanaman · M
Oh boy. It means they haven't a clue. 🙄😒🤷‍♀️
Gangstress · 41-45, F
They just dont know what youre going through its tough if honest.
Unless they have wore that tshirt they wont know. Even i have had a 'what i done wrong". Its like its not you. Im just devoid of emotion
Graylight · 51-55, F
It's insecurity. Everybody's prone to a little bit of it now and then. I really wouldn't read too much into it.
SW-User
Means they are not aware of what you need in that moment
smileylovesgaming · 31-35, F
Guy's don't really understand that kind of stuff.
Bang5luts · M
No. That is them not seeing things from your point of view. Lack of empathy on their part

 
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