Positive
Only logged in members can reply and interact with the post.
Join SimilarWorlds for FREE »

My Journey

I’ve been thinking a lot about how different things feel now compared to two years ago when mom and I first came to live with my stepdad. I used to be angry a lot. I felt like everything was unfair, like I was always being watched or expected to mess up. It was hard adjusting to someone new being in charge, especially someone who wasn’t my real dad.

At first, every rule felt like a punishment waiting to happen. I didn’t understand the structure, and I didn’t trust that it came from a place of care. I just felt embarrassed and frustrated all the time. But over time, I started to see the pattern — and I’m not saying I love it, but I understand it now.
My stepdad is strict, but not unpredictable. When I mess up, I know exactly what will happen. There’s always a talk, always a consequence, and always a point afterward where he checks in. That part matters. It’s not just about getting corrected, it’s about being reminded that I can do better, and they believe I will.

I don’t feel as angry about it anymore. It’s just the way things work here. And weirdly, having that structure — knowing where the lines are — made me feel more settled. I’ve learned to take responsibility faster, to apologize without waiting to be forced, and to listen before reacting. Some days I still push back, because that’s who I am. But I also know they’re not just trying to control me — they’re trying to raise me. That’s a big difference. And two years in, I finally get it.
Top | New | Old
understand what you’re saying about structure. I don’t have a dad or stepdad, so d nothing there I can say. I do have a mom that’s strict and we must follow the rules of face the consequences. But talking before and after punishment is important and knowing you are loved.
Hope we can talk sometime.
MomstepmomHailey · 41-45, F
@Kaitlinw218 dad stepdad mom stepmom
Spanking is same
samueltyler2 · 80-89, M
@MomstepmomHailey you are apparently following me, but have not responded to a message I sent.
1olderguy20 · 61-69, M
@MomstepmomHailey who spanked you growing up
Well I hope my traffic ticket story was at least interesting. The town I boycotted is still there but that restaurant is long gone. Is the new marriage likely to endure? Best wishes on that front, whatever it is that would be best. Most of what I read on here suggests that your bio parent should handle any controversial discipline. Maybe if you are able to ask your mother privately, inquire whether she really has approved step-dad's approach? On SW and perhaps on Quora, spankings by step-parents are a common topic.

Do you have any contact with bio-dad? Such communication is usually rare and not all that helpful. A friend spent a lot of money tracking down her bio father, flew coast to coast, found him, spent two hours with him catching up on his new life and family, shook hands, called a limo, and returned to east coast. I asked if that was it forever. She just nodded. Kind of sad but I have read of similar reunions. These stories cast doubt on the saying that "blood is thicker than water.".
Convivial · 26-30, F
That's great... Boundaries may seem like a pain at times but they're there to ultimate protect us as we grow.... And as we grow they move further out till the whole world is our playground... I'm glad you've found peace

Hugs
Justmeraeagain · 56-60, F
Some adults do not get this and hold grudges against their parents for years.
You are one intelligent young woman, and I think, you will do well.
This comment is hidden. Show Comment
lovebcups · 61-69, M
Every feeling you describe should be normal in your situation , keep your head up and be strong.
BlackPetals · 18-21, F
You sound like a pretty amazing person. Good for you. I believe you will grow up to be somebody. 👍
MrAverage1965 · 61-69, M
So glad it seems to be working out for you
BlackPetals · 18-21, F
You seem as beautiful in the inside as you do on the outside 🥰
Which is a great deal!
QCDog2659 · 61-69, M
We are all on our own journey.

We live. Learn. Lose. Win.
SJones48 · 41-45, M
That’s great to hear! Keep up the good work
DaddyThomas · 46-50, M
We all need structure and guidance. Good parents give them to their children
We need structure in our lives, a framework, otherwise we're like a sheet flapping in the breeze with no purpose, and no direction.
Strict4u · 56-60, M
I hope you are not getting disciplined too often
your evolution is underway
it is clear. you oare thinking things thru
See a dm I sent.

 
Post Comment