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Did you ever want to be an only child? I never did, but most only children say they loved it because they got everything they wanted and everything

revolved around them. I never wanted all my parents' attention like that. Childhood may be great for only children but adulthood is hard for many I've known. They have to deal with the fact that the world no longer revolves around them.

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HannibalAteMeOut · 22-25, F

No, it would be so lonely, growing up I didn't have to make much effort socializing because I already had someone, my sister is just one year younger so we've always been close. I can't imagine growing up playing on my own or not talking to her before sleep or doing everything with just my parents and having to meet other people outside our home setting in order to feel company.
And I know people who grew up without siblings but still aren't spoiled at all and never thought the world revolves around them. Although I noticed they tend to be quite jealous of their friends, like if their friends hang out with others and feel more entitled to people's time (at least that was my observation as a child but of course it changes once they grow up).

Cloud7593 · 46-50, F

@HannibalAteMeOut I'm just going by my experience with most only children who were treated like little gods or goddesses. Certainly not all are treated like that

DrWatson · 70-79, M

Our daughter is an only child, and she most certainly did not get everything she wanted as she was growing up.

And once a kid starts interacting with other children, she learns pretty early that things will not always go her way and that the world does not revolve around them.

She is a very happy adult.

Cloud7593 · 46-50, F

@DrWatson Some people are harder on an only child because it's their one and only chance to get it right.

DrWatson · 70-79, M

@Cloud7593 I don't think that describes us either.

Luckylu · 61-69, F

I am the only girl with three brothers. I learned what it was like to have siblings and also be an only child as my brothers often didn’t want me around. I learned to be on my own and be self sufficient. Now as an adult I might as well be an only child because my brothers never reach out to make contact. Haven’t spoken to them in at least a decade.

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SW-User

@Luckylu You sound anything but heartless. In fact I'd say, and forgive me if I'm wrong but you sound more heartbroken and understandably so, but certainly not heartless.

I'm genuinely sorry your brothers never reached out to you in your time of need. Im sat here trying to make sense of their silence after such an update and I simply don't get it. I sincerely hope you are doing well on the cancer front and life in general.

Luckylu · 61-69, F

@SW-User Thanks. In regards to the cancer no sign of it, December will be 9 years or maybe I should say August since that was when I had my first surgery. October was another surgery and chemo started the end of November and I stopped it the end of December, 9 years ago. I’m doing well. The rest of of my life saw massive changes which I may finally be emerging from. It’s all a very long and complicated story, which I won’t bore you with.

You would have to know my family in order to understand the silence and lack of communication which I have worked hard to dig myself out of and not pass on to my daughter. I had hopes my brothers would want to do the same but alas that is not the case.

Thank you for your kind words and insightful observation. It means a lot to me. Not having much of it I cherish what is sent my way. 🥀🌷💙

Chickie · F

@Luckylu I feel like it's better for you that way since they don't even bother to check on you. I know it's not my place to say that especially trying not to sound insensitive

ArtieKat · M

I felt sorry for the only children I knew - like you, I never wanted all of my parents' attention, and thought it unnatural for kids to be happy going everywhere with theirs. My 2 sisters and I are close in age - three and a half years between me and the oldest, with 16 months between the girls. We could be horrid to one another 2 ganging up against the other but that probably wasn't a bad education of what to expect from life.

Cloud7593 · 46-50, F

@ArtieKat That's the main reason being an only child isn't good. I've seen many only children struggle with dealing with people. They try to control and get mad when people don't let them.

Scribbles · 36-40, F

I didn't get along with my siblings. none of us got along really. But I loved most of them, was protective of them, and wanted the best for them, and I'm happy most of them exist. 2 out of 3 of them turned out alright in the end. But I generally have no idea how to interact with them beyond just trying to be a supportive influence and make small talk as always.

I would have been much happier as an only child,
Most of us would have been actually. but that seems kind of selfish. Idk.

Some people I think have siblings that they have a close connection with, and I think that is something precious and sweet.

Most people I know who were an only child often say their childhoods felt lonely. Many of them who had good parents are often more ambitious too, I've noticed.

Cloud7593 · 46-50, F

@Scribbles I never wanted to be an only child but growing up in a big family would be hard I would think.

Chickie · F

@Scribbles I feel like people over romanticize having siblings rather knowing the reality of what's it like to have siblings. My older sister booksmart but she can be two-faced and a liar, my later sister was bad ass brat but also smart and funny, and my brother how is the youngest of all three constantly stays in trouble and my dad never punished him like he did with us. My relationship with my sister is fine but we did have some nasty fight, I don't hate them but never been close to my family or siblings.

Busybee333 · 31-35, F

Not all are spoiled. It really depends on the culture and character of their parents.

They have to deal with the fact that the world no longer revolves around them

- Every child learns this at some point, regardless of their status. Being an only child can make it more difficult socially - some things are just learned a little later, when you start to communicate with peers more. that is why children have to play with other children (face to face) a lot. They learn so much from interacting and solving things together.

Sadly, I have met many adults who still think that they are the center of the universe. Main trait: inconsiderate.
I actually feel bad for them... life will teach them, eventually. It must be a big shock for them, waking up so late.
They will only know when they meet and clash with someone like them xD

BijouPleasurette · 36-40, F

I am an only child. There were times when I would have liked a sister or brother, but it never happened. Oh well....

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BijouPleasurette · 36-40, F

@SW-User Sorry to hear that. :(

SW-User

@BijouPleasurette Are you @bijouxbroussards little sister?

BijouPleasurette · 36-40, F

@SW-User I just said I'm an only child. I am nobody's sister,

bugeye · 26-30, F

i was the opposite. i was an only child but sometimes it actually seemed a bit lonely. yeah i had my parents but i still felt it whenever i played a video game or read a book or watched another disney movie for the 100th+ time. i was doing those things alone. my BF however is the 2nd youngest of 13 and the stories of his siblings sound chaotic and sometimes all he wanted was to be alone but it seemed nice being surrounded by so many loved ones. im lucky they now treat me like a lil sister to them.

so yeah grass is always greener on the other side.

Chickie · F

@bugeye no it's not.

CrazyMusicLover · 31-35

No because all the only children I knew were saying they wished they had a sibling. I wanted a twin sister though.

HijabaDabbaDoo · F

Couldn't think of anything worse

My siblings make life worth living

Repete · 61-69, M

I was an only child and for me everything was not handed to me .i had to work to pay for my school clothes and anything else I wanted. I had two great parents but it was hard not having someone to annoy when I was bored 😂 Now I get along great with about everyone but I can and do be by myself a lot .

I have only one child that’s another story not much of a family reunion type of thing makes it hard .

MsSwan

Yes, I did. You make a good point though.

Cloud7593 · 46-50, F

@MsSwan You wanted to be an only child or you were one?

MsSwan

@Cloud7593 I wanted to be one.

SW-User

I wanted a twin . Double the awesome

SW-User

I was an only child, and everything did not revolve around me. I seldom was given things that I asked for.
My parents were very against that way of raising kids.
Of course, I grew up in the 60s and 70s which was a less permissive era... we were taught to work and wait for things.

SilentKiller · M

I'm an only child
I wish I had a sibling or 2.

As much as my mum is everything to me and she's done so much for me. Having a sibling would have been so much different even for guidance or company whenever I was alone.

Its even harder after my mum told me that she had a miscarriage before me 😒

Strix · 61-69, F

I never got everything I wanted, but the one thing I did get was listening to parents screaming abuse at each other and my mother telling me I'll never be as good as my older dead sibling. Being an only child sucked in my house.

Cloud7593 · 46-50, F

@Strix Sorry you grew up like that

Strix · 61-69, F

@Cloud7593 Way the cards are dealt sometimes!

Thevy29 · 41-45, M

I was the middle child of 5 boys. With my cousins staying with us sometimes a year or two so there were 8 of us... If blood wasn't gushing my parents didn't care. Walk it off. Dad was the youngest of 16 kids so it was to be expected.

666Maggotz ·

I was for almost 16 years. I envy my sister because by the time she was born, all the abusive people went away and my mom got better control of her mental problems.

Cloud7593 · 46-50, F

@666Maggotz Certainly not all only children have it easy.

Queendragonfly · 31-35, F

They got things but who would they share childhood with when their friends were busy and the parents were working?

Magenta · F

Indeed, it can create issues.

I grew up in a large family and I wouldn't have wanted to be an only child.

dale74 · M

I am an only child and always wanted a brother or sister

nevergiveup · M

I would have never survived with out my sister by my side

WhateverWorks · 36-40

🤔 I’m an only child and was raised.expected to be independent.. Definitely not the center of attention or that anything revolves around me haha.. My kiddo is an only child. She gets more attention than I did, but I’ve still raised her to be independent, reasonable, empathetic, and considerate. My stepbrothers on the other hand are entitled AF lol..

RedBaron · M

I didn’t have a choice since I have a brother.

PepsiColaP

As a little girl ,at times , as me and my brother would get into some bad physical fights. But I love him and ofc I loved him then too ,although over time and through maturing we became closer and I look at those fights as smth very childlike and funny ig or my thoughts of not wanting him as my sibling at the time haha

Roundandroundwego · 61-69

No, but I remember thinking about living without cruelty or violence. Boys will be boys, but I wondered what life with moments of peace might be like since I was 3.

Cloud7593 · 46-50, F

@Roundandroundwego Were you the only girl?

Roundandroundwego · 61-69

@Cloud7593 for many years.

Cloud7593 · 46-50, F

@Roundandroundwego hugs

iamnikki · 31-35, F

No, but it felt like I was an only child. My siblings are much older and we never did anything together.
I grew up, and surpassed them in a way, and I feel they resent me for it. I didn't/don't have a lot of the issues they've had/have

in10RjFox · M

I would have never wanted it. Such a boring and lonely life. Yes, I could have enslaved my parents and make them revolve around me. But they are not the world.

SW-User

No. I can't imagine life without my siblings. I think many only children grow to become masters at dealing with loneliness.

SW-User

The hardest part was supporting my parents when they were dying. With brothers and sisters you can share the anguish.

HootyTheNightOwl

No... I prefer having siblings over being an only child.

InHeaven · F

Yes, I always wanted to be the only child lol

BeachGirl47 · 26-30, F

I am an only child.

Iwillwait · M

No.

uncalled4 · 56-60, M

No. I have one brother who is awesome. I wanted a sister, too, but that never happened.

Chickie · F

Yes, I never liked my siblings.

BijouPleasurette · 36-40, F

@Chickie Why not?

Chickie · F

@BijouPleasurette My older sister picked up out mother's abusive ways, she was mean as hell to me and we had at least two physical fights because of her bad attitude and instigating things. I cannot forget the time she tried to turn my friends against me because of our disagreements, I cannot forgot the things she said behind my back on Twitter because she hated when things don't go her way or because she's can be hateful, I can't forget the times when she tried to belittle me or be my "mom" because she couldn't take what I said in my journal or because she wanted to be in control. I tried to give her so many chances but I realized that some people won't change their wicked ways which people need to understand. I already made peace with it, get along okay now but I don't think I'll ever be close with my family.

BijouPleasurette · 36-40, F

@Chickie I'm sorry you had that to contend with. That kind of thing is rare in my neighbourhood.

Musicman · 61-69, MVIP

I was a only child. I promise you the world didn't revolve around me. I definitely learned real quick how to entertain myself though.

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Musicman · 61-69, MVIP

@SW-User That is excusable. I am sorry to hear that for the both of you. Where did you grow up at?

SW-User

@Musicman Yeah... I would have shrugged it off, except at the end of the day, Mum asked "Was this your birthday?" and then threw a $20 bill on the table. That was typical of her attitude toward me. She was careless about things like birthdays before dementia set in.

I was raised in various states -- no one place was home.

Musicman · 61-69, MVIP

@SW-User My wife was like that. She lived all over the country. I was born, raised and lived in Virginia until I retired.

SW-User

No. My family is a huge part of my life and I'm very blessed to have so many brothers and sisters.

SW-User

@SW-User did they bully you?

SW-User

@SW-User nah man. I'm sure we had our moments, like all people, but nothing that I would call bullying.

This message was deleted by its author.

Cloud7593 · 46-50, F

@BlueGreenGrey Having siblings doesn't guarantee anything.

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