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What do mermaids wash their fins with? Tide

(please post your own joke...because SW needs to lighten up a little tbh)

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SW-User

Just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.

Scribbles · 31-35, F

@SW-User Hahaha! I'm stealing this joke

SW-User

@Scribbles 😂

ProdigalSummer · F

Have you ever smelled moth balls?

Yes

How did you get his tiny legs apart? 😱

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Scribbles · 31-35, F

@ozgirl512 I thought you were going to say some deceased person's balls or something instead. lol

ozgirl512 · 26-30, F

@Scribbles who me?
Nah ;)

CrazyMusicLover · 31-35

@ProdigalSummer 😂🤣 omg...

Classified · M

I don't like threesomes. If I want to disappoint two people at the same time, I'll tell my parents about my plans for the future. 😝

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Classified · M

@Scribbles I needed to give a lot of explanation with that one though. 😆

Scribbles · 31-35, F

@Classified I like it. I'm going to remember kermit the frog as kermit the kikker now. In an american accent and pronounciation it would sound like kermit the kicker. so that's kind of funny too. lol

Classified · M

@Scribbles That's very close to the proper way to pronounce it though. 😋

SW-User

R.I.P boiled water. You will be mist.

Scribbles · 31-35, F

@SW-User My brother threw milk at me. How dairy (dare he)

SW-User

Why do farts smell?

So deaf people can enjoy them too.

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Scribbles · 31-35, F

@SW-User I normally don't laugh at fart jokes...but that one is pretty good. lol

SW-User

@Scribbles

Whenever there is talk about fart jokes, I am reminded of this part of the [i]South Park[/i] April Fool's episode:

http://southpark.cc.com/clips/150273/head-cancer

Scribbles · 31-35, F

@SW-User Here I got a fart joke.

Why was the man's birthday so stinky? He was turning farty

Shipwrecked · 46-50, M

A monk, a priest, and a rabbi walk into a bar...

The bartender looks up and says, "What is this...some kind of joke?"

room101 · 51-55, M

What's the opposite of a myth?

A mythuthith with a lithp.

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Scribbles · 31-35, F

@room101 ok, this is my last corny joke on this post: I couldn't decide if I wanted to order Japanese or Chinese food. So I called it a Thai

room101 · 51-55, M

@Scribbles I'll have a mitho thoup 😜

Scribbles · 31-35, F

@room101 😂😂😂

SW-User

Why don't aliens visit our planet? Terrible ratings. One star.

Scribbles · 31-35, F

@SW-User What kind of art class does a coal miner take? minecrafts

Scribbles · 31-35, F

What did the fried rice say to the shrimp? Don't wok away from me.

SW-User

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

ButterRobot · 51-55, M

What happened to the butcher who backed into his meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work.

SW-User

@ButterRobot Eeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

GJOFJ3 · 61-69, M

Her: What rhymes with orange
Him: No it doesn't!

Scribbles · 31-35, F

@GJOFJ3 crap...i don't get it

GJOFJ3 · 61-69, M

@Scribbles "what" does not rhyme with "orange,

Scribbles · 31-35, F

@GJOFJ3 OH! 😂

Byron8by7 · M

Why does it take four women with PMS to screw in a light bulb?

It just [b]does,[/b] okay???!!!

SW-User

My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.

Scribbles · 31-35, F

What kind of cars do eggs drive? A yolkswagon

wildbill83 · 36-40, M

Byron8by7 · M

How many children with ADHD does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Let's go ride our bikes.

Scribbles · 31-35, F

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? They lack-toes (lactose)

Elegy · 46-50

What did the hot dog say to the person, eat me.

Scribbles · 31-35, F

@Elegy That's f'ing tragic. lol

What is giraffe's favorite fruit? Neck-tarines

Byron8by7 · M

What do you call a blonde standing on her head?

A brunette.

jaybird · 41-45, F

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says, "Why the long face?"

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