You speak as if Jesus was performing some kind of martyrdom exercise as he hung up there on the cross, no different really, than Americans playing the martyr game by always starting wars and then getting pisssed off at the world when nobody says "thanks for saving us".... saving us from what we'll never know, because America's motives for starting wars in the first place are never clear to the world anyway.
Jesus didn't die for what some allege are "our sins"; Jesus was killed for what he believed in, which was contrary to what all his countrymen otherwise believed in. Sort of like the difference between what Democrats believe in compared to what America's MAGA Republicans believe in.
American citizens on the other hand, march off to fight America's wars while always being sent to war under the pretense that they're fighting for their country, when in fact they are being "used" by their government as 'Soldiers For Hire'. This is because the USA makes big money from providing security services to countries who don't have a military of their own who are being threatened by countries who have way more guns than they do.
In that regard, the USA operates like a mafia extortion ring where the US funds conflict in a region so that neighboring countries have no other choice but to 'hire' the US military to fight it's American-inspired conflicts for them.
Jesus on the other hand, was attempting to teach something about human reality that most others knew nothing about; he was not trying to undermine the world for his own personal gain.
He didn't really have an option, it's not like he put himself on a cross to "die for our sins". Someone hated him enough to murder him, and then someone else decided to call it something else. It's all just silly stuff anyway.
That's why you weren't. Plus I think it was one of those things like a mandatory picnic at work. You really don't want to, but it kinda comes with the job you know?