So why is it so hard for some guys to talk?

I met a guy over the summer. We had a nice first date. I thought there was potential there. But since then nothing. Instead, he just sends me a random text about once a week with random questions, like "what's better motivation or discipline"? to which I answer and he disappears for the rest of the week.

I try to have a conversation with him and it's just one word answers. He doesn't say anything about himself and it's frustrating. Here's an example? Me: How was your weekend? Him: Good. Me: What did you do? Him: Went places. Me: Where did you go? Him: My friend's.

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BetweenKittensandRiots · 36-40, MVIP

Because we live in a culture that codes self expression as feminine and then implies the worst thing for a guy to be compared to is a woman And not enough women are very publically validating those of us who defy traditional masculinity that its highly visible. if you want men to become expressive what you'd honestly have to do is start sleeping with those of us who step out of line and express ourselves anyways in such a matter that people KNEW what was happening too. because THAT would make men question whether conforming to expectations that we never express ourselves was a great idea.

Bottom line is that it's the norms of masculinity that make so many men terrible at communication. most of us don't want to break them and have been told this is how to charm the ladies. it's wrong- but Welcome to reality. Men have been lied to quite a bit about women.

I write poetry, I would know.

calicuz · 56-60, M

He's just not that interested in you.
Move on.

blindbob · 41-45

@calicuz agreed. so why keep texting me every week?

SomeMichGuy · M

@blindbob Stringing you along. He might want you around as a backup.

BrokenAbyss

He sounds boring. He texts you to keep you on a string incase something better doesn’t come along. He’s a pig.

blindbob · 41-45

@BrokenAbyss i'm not into him. communication is an important part of attraction for me. i'm just more curious about why so many young men struggle with communication. what i see a lot is a guys who just talk about themselves the whole time or the other extreme, guys who don't say anything.

calicuz · 56-60, M

@blindbob

How old are these guys you talk to? They sound like boys in men's bodies.

blindbob · 41-45

@calicuz 30s.

Sweetpoison · 41-45, F

He is not interested. Orherwise he would make the effort

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Sweetpoison · 41-45, F

@blindbob i was just trying to say that maybe he is not bad at communicating but just not interested.

blindbob · 41-45

@Sweetpoison ok. well he is just an example of something that i've seen a lot with young men.

Sweetpoison · 41-45, F

@blindbob sorry for this.

SomeMichGuy · M

You keep mentioning that not communicating isn't attractive to *you*, but this is about choices *they* are making.

Tres13 · 51-55, M

That’s a male conversation you just had

blindbob · 41-45

@Tres13 Why is it so hard for them to talk? How do you learn things about each other if they don't say anything?

Tres13 · 51-55, M

Action man maybe?@blindbob

blindbob · 41-45

@Tres13 What do you mean by action?

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