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I Am An Immigrant

[c=#008099]Today I let myself weep with nostalgia. It's been something less than a year since I've been away from home. I feel like I'm not myself anymore. I have not spoken my language in days so all I can do is murmur when I'm alone and sing folk songs that I didn't even think I liked until recently. People here don't have the same sense of humour and communicating on a deeper level with someone is the hardest task. I feel like I'm the fool of the village. I feel like they see me as retarted. I have this bottle filled with sand from the beach near home, I sprinkle some in my hands and cry.[/c]
What a courageous person you are to move somewhere foreign and alone. I have done this before too. At times it was overwhelming. Nothing wrong with being homesick. Let yourself experience your feelings. Remember why you chose to make this move. Know that you can do most anything. Try to get outside and breathe when you feel sad. You can always choose to go home in the future. Can you go where people speak your language or sing like you do? Can you call home or Skype? You are not a fool. Know this. Brave and strong.
writhe · 26-30, F
@PoetryNEmotion [c=#008099]Thank you so much for this. I am trying my best to communicate with my people back home. Not always easy but it is something. I suppose I will get used to it some day. Just not today.[/c]
@writhe You are welcome. I came to consider the place I moved to my second home. I ended up moving again and not of my choice, and I still cherish the memories of that home. Enjoy the experience.
writhe · 26-30, F
@PoetryNEmotion [c=#008099]thank you, I will![/c]
I had a teeny tiny snippet of an experience here with a person who expressed their sorrow in a language I didn't know

and instead of just letting it go, I went into Google Translate and wrote something the bot cranked out for a translated response

and then she didn't "heart" my response. She must have known the words were generated from a machine, and her other 3 responses were genuine so she hearted them.

Then I was so embarrassed I erased my response.

************************************************************************

When a non Roman comes into Rome, it's important to do what the Romans do and try to adjust but not to expect too much felt "connection" at first...
The loneliness must be so painful!
writhe · 26-30, F
@Whiterosesociety [c=#008099]really there's nothing one could do that would help with this, it's hard if you don't know what it feels like...[/c]
@writhe I wish there was something I could say to you alone.😔
writhe · 26-30, F
@Whiterosesociety [c=#008099]thank you[/c]
SW-User
I always think of that song “I’m an alien I’m a legal alien” ... by Sting.

I know what you have .. are experiencing and it hurts.

Keep going .... never give up 🌹
writhe · 26-30, F
@SW-User [c=#008099]thanks 💙 you seem like you understand.[/c]
SW-User
I have experienced a lot of prejudice.

Take Care you’ve got this 😎 @writhe
writhe · 26-30, F
@SW-User [c=#008099]thank you so much![/c]
SarahPP · 26-30, F
That must be incredibly tough. But you made the change and you are very brave. Hold on to the things you love but give yourself credit that you are aiming for good things in future.
writhe · 26-30, F
@SarahPP [c=#008099]thank you, this is encouraging![/c]
4meAndyou · F
I know how you feel. I remember I moved to a distant state in the United States after I divorced. Nothing was the same. I didn't have friends there, and my family was very distant emotionally. I returned home for my son's wedding, and when I saw the autumn leaves and the beautiful hills of western Massachusetts, I realized just HOW homesick I really was, and I began to cry with the sense of returning home.
writhe · 26-30, F
@4meAndyou [c=#008099]I'm glad![/c]
4meAndyou · F
@writhe Someday, you will find that your new home also lives in your heart...I know it.
writhe · 26-30, F
@4meAndyou 💙
DiegoWolfe · 36-40
Why can't you use the magic of the Internet to Skype your family and have a meaningful and clearly necessary conversation with them abiut all this, I mean you don't need to explain anything to me, and if this offends you please just delete this, but it strikes me with the ease of Skype or phone or whatever you could have at least some comfort....
writhe · 26-30, F
@DiegoWolfe [c=#008099]It's difficult, I know this seems strange but with a background like mine this is difficult. We do speak on the phone but different time zones and charges makes it not so easy.
[/c] @4meAndyou I do that very often.
DiegoWolfe · 36-40
@writhe well, I just was trying to negate the costs by having you do so on the Internet where you don't have to pay long distance phone rates
writhe · 26-30, F
@DiegoWolfe [c=#008099]I understand perfectly.[/c]
DIMaverick4 · 41-45, M
I know the feeling. 3 months into my migration for studies came a day when me in a new country where I didn't speak the language, not knowing to cook, missing familiarity of food and people around, just simply sat and cried loudly in my room cursing my choices .. missing every single thing in my world before the move. 12 years later, I am proud of being a self made man .. still miss my home, but my new home has been a kind place. It wouldn't have turned so if I had give up. Persistence makes every plank you sleep on feel like home.. more power to you.. 🤗
Coppercoil · M
How sad :( I hope you find the love and acceptance here then.. I know this place has helped me through not feeling I belong where I live.
Coppercoil · M
@writhe I'm not even sure.. that's the hardest part.. not knowing.
writhe · 26-30, F
@Coppercoil [c=#008099]you will find your place 💙[/c]
Coppercoil · M
@writhe thank you 🖤
Quimliqer · 70-79, M
To express the real feeling can only be done in our native language. Abide, it will be answered...
writhe · 26-30, F
@Quimliqer [c=#008099]it really feels impossible to express myself in other languages[/c]
Quimliqer · 70-79, M
@writhe I felt the same the first time living outside my home country. I took lessons in seeking another language and although i'm no where near fluent, it helped understand and express feelings with better understanding. Keep on, life has many answers.
writhe · 26-30, F
@Quimliqer [c=#008099]that's true!Thanks![/c]
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writhe · 26-30, F
@Waymore [c=#008099]you too :)[/c]
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Uncfred · 61-69, M
I know the feeling from way back, but now I have family here and the anchor takes hold. I still miss things from "home" but I am happy now with family around me.
I am NOT an immigrant, but I so often feel as though I am, and may as well be. I wish I could find someone who speaks my language of being.
dondon · M
That's normal if you get home sick.
Where are you from and where are you now?
writhe · 26-30, F
@dondon [c=#008099]I'd prefer not to say[/c]
dondon · M
There is an easy fix for that.....
@writhe Of course - why not ? Why cant you have the best of both worlds ?
writhe · 26-30, F
@MarmeeMarch [c=#008099]I can but this once in a while you are describing is once in a very very long while.[/c]
@writhe Like I said you are young and prob dont have a ton of money and you prob have more responsibilities but one day you will hopefully have resources to travel more.
Uncfred · 61-69, M
When I finally retire I will move abroad, I wonder if I will feel the same.
I respect your forbearance and hope where you are now will be your home one day.
Ryannnnnn · 31-35, M
Where are you from and where did you move to? Its tough not having connections yet.
writhe · 26-30, F
@Ryannnnnn [c=#008099]sorry, I cannot say where I'm from or where I moved to. But yes it's very lonely.[/c]
Ryannnnnn · 31-35, M
@writhe Well I hope you meet someone who you can relate to soon :)
Just gotta keep putting yourself out there and doing what you're doing, a little bit at a time.
writhe · 26-30, F
@Ryannnnnn [c=#008099]Thank you![/c]
Tracos · 51-55, M
why did you move?
Tracos · 51-55, M
@writhe did you come alone?
writhe · 26-30, F
@Tracos [c=#008099]yes, completely[/c]
Tracos · 51-55, M
@writhe impressive! I know how hard that is .. .hang in there!!
SW-User
Where you are from is on my bucket list to see.
Where did emigrate from ?

 
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