Amber Alerts for Children “Abducted” by their Fathers This morning I was awakened by an amber...

dale74 · M

As a father with primary custody I see so many fathers that are kept from seeing their children for no reason at all. If I did not have primary custody and my ex-wife would not allow me visitation I don't know what extremes I would go to. For so long everyone's always felt sorry for the mother but nobody ever really cared about the father.

As a society Europe and America have demasulated the man they have put them in more motherly roles. A lot of times the father is the one who takes care of the child at the young age takes the child to the doctor does all the school and education and then there's a separation and they don't have the child anymore in their life. This can be devastating this can push people over the cliff. This can be very damaging as well to the child who has known the father to be there as much and sometimes even more than the mother was in there raising.

I was extremely lucky the judge in my divorce my lawyer and I argued the fact that I was the one that switched jobs to work a night shift so my child would not be in daycare till she was over 3 we were able to show without a fact that I was the one who took her to every doctor's appointment. We were able to show beyond any reasonable doubt that the first person our daughter would run to if she had a boo boo would be her father.

The judge asked each of us starting with my ex-wife what do you want and she said I want the house I want him to pay me money every month and I want our child.

I said the only thing I care about is I want my daughter.

Ihopetolivehappily · M

Yes.

I beleive Father's aren't valued as much as mothers.

And missing a father is not a problem as per those Mothers.

BlueVeins · 22-25

Yeah, iirc the vast majority of child abductions are by family members, which is... kind of reassuring, relative to the alternative. There are definitely cases where the dad is such a danger that a whole-ass amber alert is warranted; I just hope they use discretion in less serious cases where the parent doing the abducting obviously just wants to spend time with his kid.

Fluffybull · F

@Keepitsimple Exactly. Also it's not always just about "bickering between divorced/separated partners". I know of a horrendous case where the father lost custody and was forbidden from seeing his child unless supervised by social workers. The reason was he would take the child to visit the grandparents and the grandfather had a history of child abuse including his own daughter and he may have actually been the father of her child. As someone else posted, you can't judge if you don't know full facts.

Fluffybull · F

Yes. There are generally good reasons why a parent doesn't have custody of a child.

Keepitsimple · 51-55, F

Yes…they violated a court order.

WhateverWorks · 36-40

In cases such as that it’s almost always because the father has a violent and or criminal history. It’s not just that he’s stepped outside the parenting plan

NoGamesTolerated · F

Only when one parent has been given custody by the court.Then if the other snatches child, they are the perpetrator.

SubstantialKick · 31-35, M

I've gotten those before and they scare the hell out of me.

JaggedLittlePill · 46-50, F

A father is just another person. So is. A mother. The title doesn't make either an actual mother or father.

Children can be and are abducted by a parent when the parent takes the child and leaves their home state without permission from the other parent. It is called kidnapping.

bijouxbroussard · F

You’re right about that, but the Amber Alert doesn’t necessarily give the full circumstances. There was an alert here and listeners assumed it was okay because it was the father, but there had been a restraining order because of past domestic abuse.