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MarkPaul
22-25, M
United States
Join Time
1st Week of SW
Days Active
1 Yr Active
Comments
2500 Comments
Stories
20 Stories
I Need Therapy
Session 20: Getting to the heart of the matter in a heartbeat "We can't gain much traction when you don't come regularly?" "I know... I guess." "Well, I'm not going to lecture you... what is bothering you?...
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22-25, M
0 replies
9 views
Sep 23, 2017
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I Have Low Self-esteem
At the gym, I was in a conversation with another guy. A girl (woman) came by where we were and the other guy invited her into the conversation. The three of us talked to each other. Midway into the conversation, the girl asked, "So, what'...
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22-25, M
3 replies
44 views
Jul 16, 2017
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I Need Therapy
Session 19 [Abridged]: Mental Monuments and the IDEA of letting go... "Have you ever thought about letting go?" "No... I mean, what do you mean?" "You know, letting go... letting go of the past injustices you feel... of the ...
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22-25, M
0 replies
6 views
Jun 1, 2017
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I Am Coming to Terms With My Childhood
THE 3 X 5 WORLD CREATED AND LOST ONE SUMMER... One lonely summer I remember stumbling on the idea that I could keep myself company by finding something to do on my own. I was a socially awkward kid who was shy and deathly afraid of being "foun...
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22-25, M
4 replies
22 views
Apr 28, 2017
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I Need Therapy
Session 17: A victory emergency... "What happened...?" "I... the thing is... I guess I got invited to a party?" "Oh really...? Wow! I wasn't expecting that. That's good news, right? How come you seem so apprehensiv...
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22-25, M
5 replies
34 views
Mar 25, 2017
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I Often Feel Left Out And Lonely
On Being Unselected... Unselected Never wanted Always left out Feelings of being deficient Not popular drilled into me Behaviorally trained to have low self-esteem Lost and alone; no one wants me One step forward; then, always many steps back Buildi...
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22-25, M
2 replies
27 views
Mar 22, 2017
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I Battle Insecurity
Greetings from the land of insecurity Even when I recognize I am making personal development progress, I allow self-doubt and lingering self-hatred to infiltrate my state of mind. It is easy enough to tell myself, "you are over-reacting,...
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22-25, M
7 replies
40 views
Mar 10, 2017
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I Feel Sad For Complete Strangers
I have noticed him before. He, like me, is often working out alone at the gym. He is neither social nor anti-social. He's an older guy, but not that old. He seems dedicated to his work-outs, but not obsessive or well-built. Tonight, he seemed sa...
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22-25, M
3 replies
26 views
Feb 28, 2017
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I Need Therapy
Session 16: Confronting the memory... "So, the last time, you recalled a memory..." "Yeah, it was more like reliving it." "Well, it's sometimes like that. But, how did it make you feel?" "I guess it made me fe...
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22-25, M
2 replies
13 views
Feb 25, 2017
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I Need Therapy
Session 15: Forcing out a memory... [Later in the session...] "What's the memory? Remember you are safe here." "Me and a friend went skiing for the weekend. He had a contact who got us a resort hotel suite. I drove us up to the ...
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22-25, M
7 replies
30 views
Feb 12, 2017
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I Am So Down And Out
Feeling cast out, like no one likes me, like no one could (ever) like me, like I don't belong, like I repulse people or at the very least bore them, that I haven't been constructed to be with others on any meaningful level, that I am horr...
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22-25, M
21 replies
63 views
Jan 20, 2017
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Is it true... "some things are better left unsaid?"
22-25, M
18 replies
32 views
Jan 7, 2017
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Life
I Need Therapy
Session 14: A sad revelation, a step backwards, and hope... "You know, we would make better progress if you committed to coming to see me on a regular schedule." "I know..." "Well, what have you been up to? Any revelations?...
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22-25, M
6 replies
20 views
Dec 31, 2016
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Is it possible to have a meaningful, purposeful, and fulfilling life without a reciprocal emotional connection with anyone?
WHAT IF... you have zero friends... no one seems to like you... that weighs on your mind (for some reason)... you do function in society and you are not a hermit... but you just can't emotionally connect with anyone. DISCLAIMER: I am not sayin...
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22-25, M
12 replies
32 views
Dec 15, 2016
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Friends & Acquaintances
I Need Therapy
Session 13: I need therapy... "To tell you the truth, I was thinking about you and hoping I would see you before the holidays. I remember this is when you always feel like you need to talk. So, I am glad you are here." "Yeah, I gue...
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22-25, M
2 replies
19 views
Nov 23, 2016
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I Am Feeling Left Out
Constructed to be solitary... I can recognize and acknowledge that I have been making steady progress in my social development journey. Several months ago, I agonized that I interacted with no one on a social level. I described the experience as bei...
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22-25, M
5 replies
59 views
Sep 27, 2016
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I Need Therapy
Session 12: Finding support by feeling unsupported and crying about it... "It's been awhile, a long while..." "Yeah, I guess I know." "So, what's been going on? How are you?" "I think I realized something...
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22-25, M
1 reply
43 views
Aug 22, 2016
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I Am Going to Say Something Controversial
The idea that Donald Trump is a successful businessman is one largely promoted by him and Warren Buffet has disputed the idea. The idea that Donald Trump would keep us safe is one largely promoted by him and the former CIA Director has disputed the i...
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22-25, M
24 replies
65 views
Aug 5, 2016
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I Know Sadness
The sadness that never leaves... It's always there. Sometimes it's active; other times it's idle. It remembers every moment and uses those moments to make its presence and power known even during its down time: The fear of asking ...
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22-25, M
14 replies
55 views
Aug 4, 2016
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I Need More Positive Social Interactions
MAYBE... I can't deny that I have been making slow and steady progress in building more positive social interaction. It's been hard, but it's been enjoyable. I am able to engage in conversations, even initiate some of them. I don...
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22-25, M
6 replies
35 views
Aug 2, 2016
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MarkPaul | Similar Worlds