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Why is the art of conversation lost on some people?

When I’m trying to get to know a new guy, it’s always me who ends up asking a lot of questions to get to know them. Yet there’s no back & forth where they ask me questions to get to know me. 🤷🏻‍♀️It’s a turn off, so future conversations rarely occur.
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Put a sweater on and talk about yourself. Or stop talking to homos
[@73351,marsbar] guys that aren't just looking for a front for their own gayness will ask you real questions. And not those "wHaTs yOuR fAvOrItE cOloR? Derrrr" questions. They'll ask you "where'd you bury your ex husband and how much did you cash in on his life insurance??!"
marsbar · F
[@1168905,Semenstains] 🤦🏻‍♀️
[@73351,marsbar] my job here is done.

"Don't be afraid to call a guy out for being an uninteresting queer bait." - Hellen Keller
DragonFruit · 61-69, M
I don’t know....I’m shy by nature, but if someone starts asking questions to try to get to know me, I’ll respond in kind after I’ve been asked a couple of questions. You can’t get to know much about someone else if you don’t ask a few questions.
marsbar · F
[@475592,Dragon56] Exactly
Picklebobble2 · 56-60, M
Yes bit of a non-starter if you can’t hold a conversation 🙁
marsbar · F
[@448576,Picklebobble2] Yes, & this is only on text. I can’t imagine how it’d be in person.
Picklebobble2 · 56-60, M
[@73351,marsbar] All those long uncomfortable silences 😖
marsbar · F
[@448576,Picklebobble2] Yeah 😅
texasdaddydom · 51-55, M
I get the reverse love them one letter replies also lol
marsbar · F
[@483204,texasdaddydom] That’s frustrating. Lol
Coz: lol, BRB, smh, 'k, and meh

🤷‍♀️

It seems it's an opposing indexing thing - the smarter the phones get, the dumber peeps are🤣
marsbar · F
[@912138,OogieBoogie] 🤣
MilitantIrishman · 26-30, M
Ironically, social media is making people less skilled socially.
marsbar · F
[@8731,CallMeDex] I know, but I’ve also spoken to men my age & older, & the conversations have been heinous. 😅
Shutterbug · 51-55, M
On another site he is going ..... "she gave me the third degree, like question after question, I just wanted some sex!"
marsbar · F
[@377577,Shutterbug] 🤣
[@377577,Shutterbug] 😄
Classified · M
If you are fortunate they request you to 'tell something about yourself'. 🤔 If they ask specific questions you gotta keep him. Those are rare. 😋
marsbar · F
[@444927,Classified] It’s fun when they can engage me in conversations, especially when they can make me laugh.
Classified · M
[@73351,marsbar] If they talk now, they'll probably also talk later. So that's good if you want something long term.
marsbar · F
[@444927,Classified] Yes
They either dont care to get to know you or theyre enjoying your attention too much. Or both
marsbar · F
[@25627,Selah] Then why message me in the first place if they don’t care to know me? Lol

I think a lot has to do with their personality.
samueltyler2 · 70-79, M
Maybe your presence intimidates him? Your personality is larger than life!
marsbar · F
[@5627,samueltyler2] Well in this age, texts/messages is the first method of communicating with someone. If that doesn’t work, I certainly won’t talk to them on the phone.

I’ve had successful text messaging convos with guys, & these are the men I’ll agree to meet on a first date. I’m just saying that “clicking” doesn’t happen often.
samueltyler2 · 70-79, M
[@73351,marsbar] that is sad though. Humanity has existed for millions of years because we communicate, verbally.
marsbar · F
[@5627,samueltyler2] Yes
Keepitsimple · 51-55, F
I remember somebody messaged me a few ago and I would talk and he had like a few words to say. I figured ok, I’ll talk and he’ll get more comfortable so I was asking questions and he told me I sounded like I was interrogating him so I told him he sounded dead and blocked him. Some people are weird.
[@11509,Keepitsimple] I'm honored
marsbar · F
[@11509,Keepitsimple] Yes. LOL
Harmonium1923 · 51-55, M
[@917533,saragoodtimes] Oh, you’re in!
ShayAdonia · 22-25, F
Some people suck at talking. Sometimes you can’t click with everyone.
marsbar · F
[@474305,ShayAdonia] Then suck at texting too. Lol

It’s a huge thing I’ve noticed on these dating apps. Even if these men make the first move to message me, they’re not engaging.
Diesel95 · 36-40, MVIP
I tend to be quite curious about new people
marsbar · F
[@395544,Diesel95] That’s good.
Diesel95 · 36-40, MVIP
[@73351,marsbar] I have a hell of a story to tell but am more interested in other people
marsbar · F
[@395544,Diesel95] 👍🏼
It's because they aren't interested in getting to know you or having a relationship. They just want to get laid.
marsbar · F
[@517284,HarryRidesTheShortBus] Well if that’s their effort in getting laid, I’m sure they have blue balls. Lol
Keepitsimple · 51-55, F
BEST COMMENT!!!!!!BEST COMMENT!!!!![@517284,HarryRidesTheShortBus]
Northwest · M
[@517284,HarryRidesTheShortBus] Yes, people speak volumes about their intentions, based on what they do not say. You just have to "listen", and you can understand what they have in mind.
acpguy · C
I have always asked girls / ladies a lot of questions that are very important, like: Do you like to fish? Do you hunt? Like to shoot targets? Does your family have any good hunting land? You like hiking? and more..........😅
acpguy · C
[@11509,Keepitsimple] We have a lot.
acpguy · C
[@11509,Keepitsimple] On my profile page I have photos I think you can view as I had added you as a "friend" a long time ago but only two I think are of the Badlands near where we hike. I have more I should add but haven't.
Keepitsimple · 51-55, F
[@20049,acpguy] I’ll take a look. I asked her what’s there and she said google it 🤦🏻‍♀️. I’ll have to tell her about this. 🙂
Valdaine · M
It's usually the same here
marsbar · F
[@573519,Privatehell] It’s tiring to always carry the conversation.
Valdaine · M
[@73351,marsbar] true, and makes me feel they aren't interested
marsbar · F
[@573519,Privatehell] Yes
Gaiia · F
Very boring like that 😣
marsbar · F
[@536386,Gaiia] Extremely
tenente · 90-99, M
same: on dates, on business, with friends and relatives. i'm always learning more about them, than they are learning about me. people aren't curious - and that's a shame, not because i think i'm interesting, but because you can't learn anything about the world by keeping to yourself. i have a simple mantra: be less impressed, be more involved.
marsbar · F
[@15494,tenente] That’s good Socks!
Its just the people you're talking to possibly? I seem to have convos that seems like minutes but actually last hours and hours. I can assure you that the lack of conversation skills can go both ways here unfortunately lol
marsbar · F
[@353058,Complexconfessions] Yes, I know. I’ve had quite a lot of experience with younger guys. Some definitely can engage in conversation.
[@73351,marsbar] probably can't get some to shut up as well 😂
marsbar · F
[@353058,Complexconfessions] Yes, one in particular comes to mind. Lol
RubySoo · 51-55, F
I think the best way around this is to set up an alt account and talk to ourselves!!!
Keepitsimple · 51-55, F
I can’t even get off this one unless I’m sleeping 🤦🏻‍♀️[@329653,RubySoo]
RubySoo · 51-55, F
[@11509,Keepitsimple] lol....yeap!! I understand that situation....x
marsbar · F
[@329653,RubySoo] 😂
SW User
I found on sites like here the monosyllabic responses certainly mean I lose interest quickly
RubySoo · 51-55, F
[@14688,Nunos50] yeah.......lol!🤪
marsbar · F
[@14688,Nunos50] Definitely
Eddiesolds · 56-60, M
I get that also.maybe they dont care
Eddiesolds · 56-60, M
[@73351,marsbar] yes you're right.some are very easy to convesate with.some just arent.maybe they are shy
marsbar · F
[@438210,Eddiesolds] That too, but they need to get over that if they want a chance in the dating world.
Eddiesolds · 56-60, M
[@73351,marsbar] yes. When was n a dating site.i wondered that also.some were crazy though!lol
LadyJ · 41-45, F
I've noticed that myself a few times with males and females on here,some people are just self absorbed and dont realise its a two way thing.i dont want to spend an hour talking about their life 🙄🤣
marsbar · F
[@1086727,LadyJ] Lol. Yes
Conversation has changed since Social Media and the initial forcing one to write under a certain number of characters. Now it's more like a quick back n forth.
marsbar · F
[@1143040,Iwillwait] Yes
[@73351,marsbar] I think there's a real skill set and an art to conversation, some people possess it, others don't. Because it's also a skill-set, I believe it can be and has to be learned.
marsbar · F
[@1143040,Iwillwait] I agree.
Lilymoon · F
It is ...and it's sad. I miss long conversations 😐
marsbar · F
[@1141547,Lillymoon] Yes, & when that happens with a guy, it peaks my interest.
Lilymoon · F
[@73351,marsbar] for sure!!!
Cause their mind is elsewhere..
marsbar · F
[@209334,StellasXOF] Possibly...like on their groin? 😅
[@73351,marsbar] ha 😅
marsbar · F
[@209334,StellasXOF] 🤭
DunningKruger · 56-60, M
A different circumstance, but I remember when I first met my future step-daughter-in-law. We were in a car together, while the wife and the stepson followed in his car. I tried to start up a conversation with the FSDIL, asking questions about her family and her job and all that. She asked me not a single question in return, and it was clear that she had no interest in doing so at all. That encounter may have colored my opinion, but the years since have not altered my impression of the SDIL as completely self-absorbed and narcissistic.
marsbar · F
[@10617,DunningKruger] Oh boy. I guess that’s who she is.
RubySoo · 51-55, F
Im not here for romance, just friends....you'd think it would be easier...but i dont think it is. And its so sad that ive had close friends here...people i adored who are no longer here. Friend i spoke with for hours and hours a day...I in particular i still think of everyday.
marsbar · F
[@329653,RubySoo] Yes, when they stop communicating & you don’t know why.
RubySoo · 51-55, F
[@73351,marsbar] There have been times hes told me we cant be friends.....and hes not been in touch for a while. But this time....all was fine between he and I.
The nature if our friendship meabs i worry about him when i dont hear from him.....but theres nothing at all i can do about it if he chooses not to contact me. 😔
marsbar · F
[@329653,RubySoo] Yes, that’s right. It’s out of your control at that point.
JoyfulSilence · 46-50, M
Maybe you attract introverts.
marsbar · F
[@68716,JoyfulSilence] Some are for sure.
Catzgano · 26-30, F
Try texting 😂
Catzgano · 26-30, F
[@73351,marsbar] wow. I wonder what else they are doing? 🙄
marsbar · F
[@448279,Catzgano] Oh, I’ve caught some doing “that”. 😒
Catzgano · 26-30, F
[@73351,marsbar] ugh
Jeffrey51 · 51-55, M
Is he a quiet and shy guy? Maybe there’s some questions he wants to ask but he might think they may offend you.
marsbar · F
[@865932,Jeffrey51] I don’t really get to know their personalities because most times, we never text again.
wildbill83 · 36-40, M
many have lost the ability to have a conversation without the use of their thumbs... 🤔
marsbar · F
[@597698,wildbill83] 😂
CookieCrumbs · 41-45, F
You tell yourself: “Next.”
If they are interested, they would ask the questions to know you better. There is a difference between shy and uninterested.
marsbar · F
[@660851,CookieBites] Yes. I say “next” quite often. Lol
JoeyFoxx · 51-55, M
So, whatcha wearin?

Lol
marsbar · F
[@802348,JoeyFoxx] Ha!
JoeyFoxx · 51-55, M
[@73351,marsbar] are you saying this isn’t valid conversation???
marsbar · F
[@802348,JoeyFoxx] No! Nexxxtttt! 😄
cycleman · 56-60, M
a history in seeing others shoulders turn against you, defeats the positive possibilities of what may lay ahead with someone else.
marsbar · F
[@134288,cycleman] Sorry 😕
Iz cuz I’m soopid 😌
marsbar · F
[@527461,Teggy] 😄
[@73351,marsbar] Hi Marsy! Hope your days going well ❤️

Love you long tyyyyymmmeeehh
marsbar · F
[@527461,Teggy] Love you long time too Tegs if you can dance like this. 🤭 You know I love this. 😂

[youtube=https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=UsvmCMbzFjs]
Viper · 31-35, M
Because not technology has gotten us to be more introverts.

That or he could see and was sharing at your peaches 🤭
marsbar · F
[@800884,Viper] What??? 🤣
Viper · 31-35, M
[@73351,marsbar] people talk less, text more, so talking is a loss art
marsbar · F
[@800884,Viper] I didn’t get that at all from your first comment. 😅

 
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