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What do you suspect is most likely the reason it is so difficult for most people to get love right?

Getting love "right" as in finding a compatible partner who genuinely respects, trusts and loves them and is willing to put in the effort to maintain a healthy relationship?
curiosi · 61-69, F
Because we come with baggage and expect the other to lift us up. We have to heal ourselves no one can do it for us. Once we are healed we are free to love freely.
Zaphod42 · 46-50, M
I think it’s different for everyone. I have abandonment issues, and even 5 years into my current relationship and with how amazingly well it’s going, I’m just sure that any day now she’ll leave me.

On the other hand some people ruin it with control issues. Or intimacy issues. Commitment issues. Hell, pick an issue and I’m sure it’s ruined someone’s relationships.
Iwillwait · M
In a world and time where immediate gratification is the reflex of societal norms, it is almost impossible for love to be done/found,"Right." I believe we would need a complete shift in our world, like a "Hard Reset," to see values restored and "Love," being done right.
Earthwrap · 41-45, M
Here is one idea.
Humans have vivid imaginations and have been writing and acting out the perfect love story for centuries. In a story or a vision it's simplistic. Then television was invented and instead of writing those simple perfect love stories they made them into short movies.
Movies then brainwashed people into having expectations. Then capitalism and media and greed took advantage of that to sell junk to people along with this vision and story which reinforced the vision or fantasy or expectation.
After all these years, expectations are all built up about their perfect love or vision they have formed since they were little. The problem is, everyone has a different vision and they all think it's more simple than it is.
Then if that vision isn't found in reality they are quick to give up without any effort or understanding that real life is more complicated than the movies or fantasies.
There seems to be so little emphasis on negotiation in the films.@Earthwrap
Earthwrap · 41-45, M
@AnonymouslyYours I also believe humans are extremely bad at communication. Everyon just assumes other people are mind readers. I think it's getting worse too for some reason. Another problem is you have globalization of mixing cultures. That really gives everyone different mismatched expectations.
No one teaches how to love, respect, communicate, conflict resolution, etc... They just expect people to get along instinctively. When in history has that ever worked?
ozgirl512 · 26-30, F
Some people change after marriage, and some never change... But I think just poor decision making in someone's part
OnePatheticClown · 51-55, M
One reason I see are preconceived ideas on what it is, what people think they should want and so on...
SW-User
They go in with unrealistic expectations. Life is not a movie
I think people become too hung up on outwards appearances and miss clear red flags that indicate incompatibility.
SW-User
This message was deleted.
SW-User
Unrealistic expectations and thinking love is like some movie.

low standards
Donotfolowme · 51-55, F

 
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