What causes a person to become selfish?

@Coralmist all behavior depends on a pre-established set of priorities, a value system is a system that establishes these priorities. if others are believed to be important then the behavior will reflect this. if a compassionate person sees a person, child or animal in need, doing nothing will be unbearable, on the contrary, he will be possessed with a desire to urgently come to their needs. so because of his system of values one behavior is then more pleasant than the other. in other words doing nothing would cause psychological suffering while doing something will feel "right".because of this altruism does exist but absolute altruism doesn't and would actually make no sense.

@reflectingmonkey Wise wise wise. You break down human motivation well.

@SW-User thank you. one day many years ago I was wondering about motivation and as a thought experiment I asked myself " why is there behavior? why don't we just sit down and remain immobile until we die?". answering that answers many questions.

@SW-User Truth.

@SW-User I agree with this

@SW-User Yes good point. Being alive is like survival of the fittest.

@InHeaven Yes also upbringing but some siblings differ in behavior some are generous others are selfish

@RebelFox True, being deprived of love and attention can make a person protective and it’s hard to give what one has not received enough.

@kentex35 I wonder if they could ever relate to someone in need, or they lack so much empathy. Many of rich people struggles are just very unrelatable.

@TessDun you're right.

@carpediem True enough😉

@Jenny1234 Sadly it’s true

@Rolexeo Yah,, the ones I see as really selfish are those who have so much but still very calculating. True also that sometimes kindness is abused caused by selfishness of others

@SW-User True

@BluntSm0ker ohh no

@GeistInTheMachine True, a lot of causes. Also not receiving enough love and attention while growing up can really mess someone up

@TessDun Yup. I have seen this first hand.

That's where Borderline comes from.

@GeistInTheMachine Yes, same here :( Building that stable emotional foundation through healthy self-love will be worth it.

@InHeaven Yep!

@SW-User Maybe by being genuinely happy from within

@TessDun Can't really do that on your own though.

@SW-User thanks for pointing that out, agreed, it can’t be rooted in a single cause

@SW-User Yes for self preservation and yes sadly there is a different level

@TessDun With humans it's always about self. It's the way it is. We fool ourselves thinking we do things for others. Even if we do, it's to be liked or feel good.

@TessDun That's the best time to share and give what you do have anyway.

@SW-User there is always the fear of losing the little one has without any support in return, but yah,, it’s the good side of being human, those who have good hearts and have the same struggles can easily sympathize and help

@TessDun Sometimes the most valuable things aren't material at all.

@SW-User Yes it’s the feeling of being inadequate enough from within making it hard to be sufficient for others

@TessDun precisely

@bijouxbroussard usually but it's not like 90% that do. I wonder if it learned behavior or a survival technique or jealousy and meanness.

@bijouxbroussard Agreed, how parents guide them at a young age is very important

@nedkelly Yes a lot of them

@Iwillwait agreed

@ImRileyTheDog Yes and lack of it

@Spokeskitties75 They don’t want to share

@OogieBoogie True. Also it seems reasons change based on one’s life status. But there are just naturally selfish . Human nature is complicated

@TessDun ugh , yeah we are.

And you're right, if one has lead a privileged life, they can often have never had the chance to learn.

From as early as one year of age we can have experiences that cause us to learn to be selfish - it's emotional self defence mechanism.

@SW-User They don’t :(

@Darksideinthenight2 I don’t get the reason why those who have so much tend to be less generous.