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My ex won’t let go and is playing mind games…

We’ve been separated for 3 and a half months. He doesn’t want to accept it and after a few months of him picking fights with me, coming over here to yell at me and telling me what an awful person I am. Now he’s changed and is saying the sweetest things to me.

I’m on tinder, he knows, I told him to try tinder. So after he says these amazingly sweet things to me, he tells me he joined tinder because I told him to and it just made him more sad and miss me more.

Now he wants to have a deep conversation to know all the details about my tinder fun. Saying he’s put up with more than most men (even though we’re not together) and that I owe it to him to tell him.

Can someone explain his side to me? A prospective I’m not seeing? Truthfully it just feels like a really bad idea to answer the questions he’s asking.
PepsiColaP · 22-25, F
he is controlling and abusive,set boundaries,keep your personal life personal. I know you think you are helping him by being honest and open but you are only enabling his toxic mindset, unwillingly and unknowingly but still
Marstar22 · 36-40, F
[@1090951,PepsiColaP] you are completely right. I did tell him that I wasn’t going to answer those questions because I didn’t see the point and it would just piss him off and build resentment
PepsiColaP · 22-25, F
[@774107,Marstar22] you shouldnt even explain yourself to him. Im sorry you are in that situation I hope he leaves you alone soon
Marstar22 · 36-40, F
[@1090951,PepsiColaP] we have kids so that’s unlikely. In the beginning of our separation I told him I wanted no contact, he could go through one of my best friends or my mom if he needed to say something or make plans to see our daughters. That when he showed up and yelled at me and told me I’ve betrayed him, i’m terrible etc
nonsensiclesnail · 46-50, F
It sounds as though he’s not willing to accept that you and he ate done. And if he can’t bully you back to him he’s going to ‘love’ you back while playing along.

He needs help and not from you.
Marstar22 · 36-40, F
[@807598,Eternity] that’s sound advice and what I’m trying to do. Thank you 🤗
Eternity · 22-25, M
[@774107,Marstar22] disclaimer: I'm not a professional and I know it is super easy to give advice when one isn't actually the one under fire, so definitely take what I say with a grain of salt, but everything I've said has come from a genuine place of wanting to help.

Good luck and you're very welcome.
Fairydust · F
They are only being nice to win you back, it’s fake and he’ll turn abusive again once he has you back.
Sweetpoison · 36-40, FVIP
Be careful, he seems to be obsessed with you like you are his thing, this can be pretty dangerous
Marstar22 · 36-40, F
[@1056635,Sweetpoison] I’m really trying!!!! 😩
Sweetpoison · 36-40, FVIP
[@774107,Marstar22] this is not love, believe me. So be strong and move on, and with move on i mean break the contact , i went trough this and only later you will realize that guys that do this have a problem and are dangerous.
Marstar22 · 36-40, F
[@1056635,Sweetpoison] I agree with you and so would all of my friends.
Harriet03 · 41-45, F
Marstar22 · 36-40, F
[@763897,Harriet03] lol
Harriet03 · 41-45, F
[@774107,Marstar22] Chin up ✌️

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