My ex won’t let go and is playing mind games…

We’ve been separated for 3 and a half months. He doesn’t want to accept it and after a few months of him picking fights with me, coming over here to yell at me and telling me what an awful person I am. Now he’s changed and is saying the sweetest things to me.

I’m on tinder, he knows, I told him to try tinder. So after he says these amazingly sweet things to me, he tells me he joined tinder because I told him to and it just made him more sad and miss me more.

Now he wants to have a deep conversation to know all the details about my tinder fun. Saying he’s put up with more than most men (even though we’re not together) and that I owe it to him to tell him.

Can someone explain his side to me? A prospective I’m not seeing? Truthfully it just feels like a really bad idea to answer the questions he’s asking.

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

nonsensiclesnail · F

It sounds as though he’s not willing to accept that you and he ate done. And if he can’t bully you back to him he’s going to ‘love’ you back while playing along.

He needs help and not from you.

Eternity · 26-30, M

@Marstar22
@nonsensiclesnail I second this.

Whatever details may be lost through only hearing one party, the fact is that you are done.

And if even one person in a relationship is done then the whole relationship is done as well.

He needs to accept this and all you owe him is to level with him one good time. Anything after that is undue, unnecessary, and perhaps even counterproductive.

Marstar22 · 36-40, F

@Eternity I completely agree, unfortunately he doesn’t see it that way. He just gets into my head and makes me second guess everything.

Eternity · 26-30, M

@Marstar22 easier said than done but: ignore him. If he asks you important questions that involve things that you both have to handle together then answer those, but if he tries to get into places he ought not be then clam up and don't budge.

Keep it strictly professional basically.

Marstar22 · 36-40, F

@Eternity that’s sound advice and what I’m trying to do. Thank you 🤗

Eternity · 26-30, M

@Marstar22 disclaimer: I'm not a professional and I know it is super easy to give advice when one isn't actually the one under fire, so definitely take what I say with a grain of salt, but everything I've said has come from a genuine place of wanting to help.

Good luck and you're very welcome.

This comment is hidden. Show Comment