Desperate for friends. They all just want to sell their MLM Products.

Guys.. I’m so desperate for girlfriends. I’m a mom.. wife.. with a wonderful family but sometimes I just want girlfriends to walk with or talk with or drink wine with.. I spend a lot of time supporting women on social media.. liking posts commenting how beautiful people are, positive vibes all the way. I often reach out to try and connect and build friendships... I recently came to this realization that I put in a lot of effort to support others.. and I don’t see reciprocation.. they don’t like my posts.. I don’t get invited to Digital happy hours or even some get togethers (it’s a weird time I know) but what bothers me the most is, I might send a message to someone and weeks will go by no response.. to then get a response that’s like “oh my gosh I’m sorry I’m just writing you back, Aw that’s neat! Blah blah what seems like genuine response”... I get excited right thinking “aw yay they wrote me back”... next message from that person is “by the way I’ve started selling x,y,z... are you interested in joining my party?”... I have 4 occasions that this has happened in the last WEEK... it makes me so upset.. such a bait and switch,.. what the hell girls..why are people like this..

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Mamapolo2016 · F Best Comment

It's possible that since you (my impression) are ambitious (that's not a bad thing), independent woman, maybe you are drawn to women who give off the same vibes.

It may be your friend-seeking-pool needs adjustment.

Brassm0nk3y · 36-40, F

@Mamapolo2016 I never thought of it this way! Thank you for this :)

Heartlander · 80-89, M

:) it may be the same reasons why people don't often bum around with their dad, or their mom, or their boss or teachers, or their regiment commander, or their proctor or chief.

It's tough to be both the captain of the team and one of the guys. At any one time you are usually one or the other, but it's usually the circumstances that determine which.

:) in the "there's a John Prine song for practically every situation in life" category, this brings to mind the lyrics of his "Illegal Smile" song, in part ...

"...
Last time I checked my bankroll
It was gettin' thin
Sometimes it seems like the bottom
Is the only place I've been
I chased a rainbow down a one-way street dead end
And all my friends turned out to be insurance salesmen
..."

the point being that the time to take notice of lack of sincere friends may be when other things may not be going so well, times when we think we could use a friend.

Brassm0nk3y · 36-40, F

@Heartlander this was SUCH a great answer. Thank you for this so much :)

Heartlander · 80-89, M

@Brassm0nk3y

Well thank you ❤️

4meAndyou · F

Okay...well, first, even if you ARE desperate, NEVER use that word. It just drives people away. They think you will be one of those clingy people who are boring and annoying.

You have to realize that you have to BE a real friend to someone else first. Then, eventually, they will realize your value.

But don't be crushed if the people you know turn out to be shallow users. 97% of all the people you meet in your life will become acquaintances, and never become real friends.

If you want to have friends over for wine or exercise with, wait till this virus thing is over. THEN go to the gym. Take a spin class. Don't be overly friendly, but you might actually meet women there who are interested in the same things you are, and you can invite them for a walk if they live near you.

Go to a wine tasting....same drill.

Brassm0nk3y · 36-40, F

@4meAndyou great idea! These make total sense to me :) thank you for responding to my questions

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