Anyone who's had trauma/abuse in your past

Do you ever feel this spiraling thought that if you think about the trauma/abuse, you fear you're just going to die because it was so much? Like even thinking about it will cause harm. I know it's anxiety itself, but it's a panicky, scary thought nonetheless. 🙁

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Justmeraeagain · 56-60, F

I don't think about it; it's there, and I know it happened.
I wrote a lot about it in the past; it seemed to help at the time.
The dreams seemed to lessen the more I wrote about the abuse.
Like I left the pain on the page and had no more need to remind myself of details.