I'm not sure how I'm doing today

I'm not suicidal anymore, but I don't seem to feel much of anything now. There's a weight within me dragging me down, but it doesn't feel bad like depression normally does - it's just there. I do feel empty except for the weight, but that emptiness feels disconnected from anything else. It's a step in the right direction, maybe(?) at least in one sense, but it's a lot like just walking in place not actually going anywhere. I think I'm struggling a bit but it's so vague I can't tell for sure.