idk what happened to me.

I didn't go through anything new, these awful memories have always been here. Recently I just started somehow processing them differently. Not necessarily in a good way, at least not entirely. Although I consider myself more compassionate I'm also more miserable.

I shouldn't have started smoking marijuana. There's no way of telling how it altered my brain chemistry.

I'm not upset about caring for people more. I just wish I could have kept the part of me that was carefree, albeit in short bursts—but it felt real when it was there. Now it's just gone.