Narcissists only rule in their houses
They think that they can continue holding that over your head as a form of power and control forever but they're wrong.
My father isn't as powerful as I thought he was. He's a pathetic, bitter, fatso who will rot alone because he's unbearable and no one ever visits him.
An old man, a stranger asked me if I was gonna do anything for fathers day.
I told him my father doesn't deserve to be celebrated.
The old man looked at me as if I was in the wrong for saying that but he's never walked a mile in my shoes.
He told me about his father and his sounded like the father i never had.
Mine was just a physically abusive wifebeater and child beater. A person who loved hearing his own voice but never anyone else's. A person who criticizes anyone under his roof whenever he gets the chance.
I know there's different types of narcissists. I'm not sure exactly which kind my father is but his toxic ways often leak out in public. He tries his best to appear normal but god forbid someone offends him. He's offended by seemingly everything.
"Did you see how that person didn't move out of my way?"
"That lady thinks she's better than me"
"The cashier did this on purpose to piss me off"
I felt terrible for customer service employees. He'd always find something to be offended about and he'd make a scene about it. It was embarrassing to go anywhere with him. He was chronic road rager too. He loved being angry on the road and putting me and my siblings in danger just because he was too immature to manage his emotions in a healthy manner.
He got offended once when I told him I was looking for a mentor. I am not at all proud to be my fathers son. My father has a disgusting and vile soul.
I don't want to be anything like my father.
It's why i suppressed my anger for so many years. Because I associated anger with violence.
I'm still having trouble accessing that emotion even now.
All i know is that I gotta be careful about it. If i do get angry it'll only be directed towards him. Because I know my parents aren't a representation of of everyone else in the world. My mother isn't like him but she did kind of become overbearing. I don't believe she meant to hurt me. She cares about me but I want my space from her and she needs to respect that.
When i tell her i don't want her help it's not because I don't appreciate it but rather because i want to know that i can take care of things myself. I want to empower myself.
I've decided to cut my father out of my life for good. I will stay in contact with my mother but from a distance because she hurt me too but I realize it wasn't intentional so I don't hate her. She suffered because of my father too.
My father isn't as powerful as I thought he was. He's a pathetic, bitter, fatso who will rot alone because he's unbearable and no one ever visits him.
An old man, a stranger asked me if I was gonna do anything for fathers day.
I told him my father doesn't deserve to be celebrated.
The old man looked at me as if I was in the wrong for saying that but he's never walked a mile in my shoes.
He told me about his father and his sounded like the father i never had.
Mine was just a physically abusive wifebeater and child beater. A person who loved hearing his own voice but never anyone else's. A person who criticizes anyone under his roof whenever he gets the chance.
I know there's different types of narcissists. I'm not sure exactly which kind my father is but his toxic ways often leak out in public. He tries his best to appear normal but god forbid someone offends him. He's offended by seemingly everything.
"Did you see how that person didn't move out of my way?"
"That lady thinks she's better than me"
"The cashier did this on purpose to piss me off"
I felt terrible for customer service employees. He'd always find something to be offended about and he'd make a scene about it. It was embarrassing to go anywhere with him. He was chronic road rager too. He loved being angry on the road and putting me and my siblings in danger just because he was too immature to manage his emotions in a healthy manner.
He got offended once when I told him I was looking for a mentor. I am not at all proud to be my fathers son. My father has a disgusting and vile soul.
I don't want to be anything like my father.
It's why i suppressed my anger for so many years. Because I associated anger with violence.
I'm still having trouble accessing that emotion even now.
All i know is that I gotta be careful about it. If i do get angry it'll only be directed towards him. Because I know my parents aren't a representation of of everyone else in the world. My mother isn't like him but she did kind of become overbearing. I don't believe she meant to hurt me. She cares about me but I want my space from her and she needs to respect that.
When i tell her i don't want her help it's not because I don't appreciate it but rather because i want to know that i can take care of things myself. I want to empower myself.
I've decided to cut my father out of my life for good. I will stay in contact with my mother but from a distance because she hurt me too but I realize it wasn't intentional so I don't hate her. She suffered because of my father too.
26-30, M
