My will to live seems to be waining fast...

I'm having memory problems that's mostly linked to my depression and ADHD. I really want to be an IT Specialist, and I'm in the class for it, it's just I can't keep up with everything and I can't seem to motivate myself to study (there's so many methods, but I am Incapable of keeping that up and I'm too poor to even afford a tutor). I'm so overwhelmed to the point where I really want to be an IT Specialist so I can get up out of my hometown that is filled with bad memories.
I just want to die, but I'm not sure how to go about it. I can't see my therapist until the 26th or 27th of this month and I just don't know what to do anymore...