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SW-User
Not even close.
zeframcochrane · 26-30, M
@SW-User I want to add in a second answer to this because everyone here is so fucking negative.
There are men and women in their 50s and 60s I've met who I'd describe as innocent even if they wouldn't themselves. They don't recognize how truly decent and good of people they are in an otherwise sometimes bleak world.
Yes, some things cannot be unseen. And I'm sure all of you have done things in your past. I have too. And maybe as the man who's still hanging onto his sense of innocence and purity even in my 20s, my words are subjective.
But you can ALWAYS come back. You can always find that same sense of innocence again.
The past doesn't matter. It does to some extent yes, it made you who you are and if you've done something horrible in your past, never forget it and live with it...but don't let it live with you.
You are not the sum of all your evils and you CAN be innocent in the world again.
Not everything can be unseen...but the abyss can be.
People can come back.
I refuse to believe anyone is broken permanently and no one can move on from their traumas or mistakes.
They will always be there and when you meet someone you will tell them about what you did...but that person will already see you for who you are at this moment: A beautiful and innocent good person who can always do better and always tries to.
You're not lost everyone.
There are men and women in their 50s and 60s I've met who I'd describe as innocent even if they wouldn't themselves. They don't recognize how truly decent and good of people they are in an otherwise sometimes bleak world.
Yes, some things cannot be unseen. And I'm sure all of you have done things in your past. I have too. And maybe as the man who's still hanging onto his sense of innocence and purity even in my 20s, my words are subjective.
But you can ALWAYS come back. You can always find that same sense of innocence again.
The past doesn't matter. It does to some extent yes, it made you who you are and if you've done something horrible in your past, never forget it and live with it...but don't let it live with you.
You are not the sum of all your evils and you CAN be innocent in the world again.
Not everything can be unseen...but the abyss can be.
People can come back.
I refuse to believe anyone is broken permanently and no one can move on from their traumas or mistakes.
They will always be there and when you meet someone you will tell them about what you did...but that person will already see you for who you are at this moment: A beautiful and innocent good person who can always do better and always tries to.
You're not lost everyone.
@zeframcochrane I appreciate this comment more than you can even know or understand. Especially today. When I say my innocence is shattered and scattered it is not said in a way that points to my specific actions or choices. It is a reflection of the moment I realized that life beats you up just as much as the blessing come down. The battles one faces can, at times be, very long and some never actually end. The reality of life is that, while it is worth living, one must guard their heart (a lesson I wish I had learned sooner in life). Innocence is believing that the world is innately good and life is rainbows and butterflies, everyone falls in love with their first kiss and lives happily ever after, good guys win and bad guys lose, and every ending is like a Disney movie. I would never take that away from someone...but I would pray that those dreams don’t shatter all at the same time.
I make the best of the hand I’ve been dealt. I’m no longer innocent to the world, in fact, I’m more than a bit jaded; but, I still try like hell to be love and be kind...especially to the innocent.
I make the best of the hand I’ve been dealt. I’m no longer innocent to the world, in fact, I’m more than a bit jaded; but, I still try like hell to be love and be kind...especially to the innocent.
zeframcochrane · 26-30, M
@Pinkstarburst Maybe I'm too young still at 24 but I meet a lot of guys my age who've been around the block or done some shit and think they're fucked for life. And that's just so not the case.
I don't know if there's an age where you just get shattered, if there is I haven't reached it yet. I've been guarding my own sense of innocence and integrity pretty closely but tbh it's mostly just because I'm so scared of getting hurt or abandoned again and I've never met a girl who wanted to stay and make me feel safe and not just have a quick romp and leave. It's why I took to wearing a purity/promise ring (nothing to do with marriage or religion) for the girl I eventually end up with.
I genuinely believe things will all end up okay in the end. It's going to be fucking hell to get there but it will. And I live my life as though I'm a character in a rom-com because I genuinely believe I am living one. Life certainly isn't rainbows and butterflies but it certainly has it's moments and the world IS innately good.
There are people out there who are truly evil. I've met them. But one sour grape does not spoil the bunch. The world is mostly decent.
Maybe I haven't been shattered enough but I've come to the edge and I've seen what I am in the dark. No one gets to my age without scars and I have plenty. That doesn't mean anyone is broken or devoid of innocence.
There are women in their 40s and 50s I look at or I talk to and my day is instantly better and it's clear that they're angels.
Doesn't matter how old you are or how many people you've slept with or screwed over. That stuff sticks with you, yeah, and it changes you. And whoever you spend your life with deserves to know the bad and the good you've done throughout your life.
But it shouldn't change the way someone looks at you RIGHT NOW.
Hell, the angellic woman of pure innocence and good who saved my life enjoys her off time as a dominatrix and has had a rough past. Doesn't change who she is in the slightest.
Be a force for good in the world and innocence will never die.
Even I'm scared that no woman will ever see me for who I was as a boy. Because I was special as a boy. I was really smart and alone all the time and always dreaming of my wife one day. And now as a young man, I'm just that, just another man. And I'm terrified. I'm terrified I'll never be special to some girl and just the opposite: I'll just always be that virgin loser.
We have to fight our own perception of ourselves or we'll never get anywhere.
Everyone thinks they live in reality but reality is none of us do, you live inside of YOU. You lives in reality after that. Everything you think, feel, see and hear gets filtered through the universe that is you. You control your internal perception. And so many people seem to think they've lost something like their innocence or they're a bad person or something.
One of the greatest women in my life I ever met was so sweet and cute and innocent and so shy...you'd never guess she's been through abuse and she'd slept with tons of guys and is FAR from innocent. But she still is. She's like the sweetest person ever.
Just be you.
There's only one.
I don't know if there's an age where you just get shattered, if there is I haven't reached it yet. I've been guarding my own sense of innocence and integrity pretty closely but tbh it's mostly just because I'm so scared of getting hurt or abandoned again and I've never met a girl who wanted to stay and make me feel safe and not just have a quick romp and leave. It's why I took to wearing a purity/promise ring (nothing to do with marriage or religion) for the girl I eventually end up with.
I genuinely believe things will all end up okay in the end. It's going to be fucking hell to get there but it will. And I live my life as though I'm a character in a rom-com because I genuinely believe I am living one. Life certainly isn't rainbows and butterflies but it certainly has it's moments and the world IS innately good.
There are people out there who are truly evil. I've met them. But one sour grape does not spoil the bunch. The world is mostly decent.
Maybe I haven't been shattered enough but I've come to the edge and I've seen what I am in the dark. No one gets to my age without scars and I have plenty. That doesn't mean anyone is broken or devoid of innocence.
There are women in their 40s and 50s I look at or I talk to and my day is instantly better and it's clear that they're angels.
Doesn't matter how old you are or how many people you've slept with or screwed over. That stuff sticks with you, yeah, and it changes you. And whoever you spend your life with deserves to know the bad and the good you've done throughout your life.
But it shouldn't change the way someone looks at you RIGHT NOW.
Hell, the angellic woman of pure innocence and good who saved my life enjoys her off time as a dominatrix and has had a rough past. Doesn't change who she is in the slightest.
Be a force for good in the world and innocence will never die.
Even I'm scared that no woman will ever see me for who I was as a boy. Because I was special as a boy. I was really smart and alone all the time and always dreaming of my wife one day. And now as a young man, I'm just that, just another man. And I'm terrified. I'm terrified I'll never be special to some girl and just the opposite: I'll just always be that virgin loser.
We have to fight our own perception of ourselves or we'll never get anywhere.
Everyone thinks they live in reality but reality is none of us do, you live inside of YOU. You lives in reality after that. Everything you think, feel, see and hear gets filtered through the universe that is you. You control your internal perception. And so many people seem to think they've lost something like their innocence or they're a bad person or something.
One of the greatest women in my life I ever met was so sweet and cute and innocent and so shy...you'd never guess she's been through abuse and she'd slept with tons of guys and is FAR from innocent. But she still is. She's like the sweetest person ever.
Just be you.
There's only one.
@zeframcochrane 🙂That isn’t innocence. What you have is integrity. Life is worth the risk as long as you keep that.
zeframcochrane · 26-30, M
@Pinkstarburst Funny because my sense of integrity that I consider to be perhaps my greatest strength and best quality is also my greatest weakness and object of constant insecurity.
Women have no idea what it's like to be a man and go through College hearing other guys tell stories of all their sexual conquests and then look at you and tell you how you'll end up an ugly 40-year-old virgin. Hell even the girls did that. Called me grease thanks to my acne in high school.
Or to have a girl leave you upon finding out you're a virgin. One of the greatest things about you that you thought as a boy "wouldn't it be romantic if I just wait for the right girl?".
No girl will ever see that. She'll never see me asking myself that as a boy and realizing how special she is years before she even entered my life.
And I'll have to deal with knowing that I'll never be the first one for her. And that feeling that I'll never be important to anyone.
Gotta love the irony. I was a loser nerd who was always alone and got called ugly and grease as a boy and was super skinny and couldn't win a fight and now at 24 I'm ripped and tattooed and the pandemic allowed me to break into music and singing and I just signed a modelling contract. Life works in funny ways.
Women have no idea what it's like to be a man and go through College hearing other guys tell stories of all their sexual conquests and then look at you and tell you how you'll end up an ugly 40-year-old virgin. Hell even the girls did that. Called me grease thanks to my acne in high school.
Or to have a girl leave you upon finding out you're a virgin. One of the greatest things about you that you thought as a boy "wouldn't it be romantic if I just wait for the right girl?".
No girl will ever see that. She'll never see me asking myself that as a boy and realizing how special she is years before she even entered my life.
And I'll have to deal with knowing that I'll never be the first one for her. And that feeling that I'll never be important to anyone.
Gotta love the irony. I was a loser nerd who was always alone and got called ugly and grease as a boy and was super skinny and couldn't win a fight and now at 24 I'm ripped and tattooed and the pandemic allowed me to break into music and singing and I just signed a modelling contract. Life works in funny ways.