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I am so confused with my sexuality right now.

Just had a sexual encounter last night with a man and I didn't like it one bit. He hurt me during sex, he wasn't gentle at all. The whole time, I wanted him to hurry up and finish so I can not be around him anymore. After he was finished, I didn't say a word and escorted him out of the home. I was in a not-feeling-it-at-all kind of mood. Just thinking about last night really blows my mood now.
This whole thing made me think about my sexuality and wonder if I really am pansexual. I was thinking that maybe I could only date men and date and have sex with women, but as I thought deeper onto that, I had a gut feeling that I won't get any arousal if I had sex with anyone in general. So, asexuality came to mind. Something told me that I'm not asexual and that maybe sex will only feel good if I have a real good connection with someone or my future lover, given that all my previous sexual encounters with men always end up with them finishing, but never me because it doesn't feel good. Usually, it'll feel like gentle strokes, nothing arousing, but then my last encounter happened and I don't want to do it anymore.

Then I remembered, 'pansexuality' means that you don't care who you want as your lover. This is going to be a really long journey...
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Strict4u · 56-60, M
Sounds like you had sex with a guy that is selfish and don’t think about the other person sex is supposed to be enjoyable by both you just need a man that knows how to treat a woman
RimaFun · 18-21, F
@Strict4u this is true too 👌
Strict4u · 56-60, M
@RimaFun thank you for understanding and agreeing with me
RimaFun · 18-21, F
@Strict4u you don't need to thank me! Lol you are just right a real man would put her pleasure before his!
Strict4u · 56-60, M
@RimaFun yes if a man finds out what she likes and really please her she will make sure you are happy too
RimaFun · 18-21, F
@Strict4u exactly! Most guys I've met in the past didn't understand that and it was soo lame
Strict4u · 56-60, M
@RimaFun different girls like different things that’s why a guy should find out so he can really please her
Xalvadora · 22-25, F
@Strict4u The thing is, I've tried, but I think I'm one of those people who need an actual connection with the person. There's no connection if both parties haven't hung out as friends or got to know each other better.
I find this whole thing funny; it seems that I can only get aroused by watching porn. But if I used that as a way to get aroused seconds before the penis is inserted in me, I won't be aroused anymore.
Strict4u · 56-60, M
@Xalvadora you need to take things slow and get to know each other and what each other likes just don’t rush into sex let it happen naturally