I Think About Suicide

Not lately but whenever i feel super sad and worthless and depressed and reject like abandoned trash.. Then i consider it.. Never attempted it.. Doubt i ever would.. It's just a glowing thought of bright hope in a dark mind of a miserable existence.. Like heaven or something idk.. You wouldn't understand unless you ever were in such a dark state of a broken mind.. It kinda seems like a win from that place..

No offense

Im fine right now.. Im just saying.. Ive been there mutiple times with such thoughts in such a place mentally.. But no further

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PhoenixPhail · M

I still think about it all the time. I used to think it wasn't a viable option, but with all the info on how wonderful it is in the afterlife, it's a great option. I'm tired of being in pain with no relief in sight.

SStarfish ·

@PhoenixPhail oh 😐 What kind of pain?

PhoenixPhail · M

@SStarfish I've had a condition for 8 years they're now calling chronic pelvic pain syndrome. For the first 5 years, they told me I had prostatitis, and treated me for that. (It's called "practicing medicine" because they don't know.) Anyway, they don't know what causes CPPS or how to treat it. Quality of life is very low with this stuff, and the suicide rate is very high among people who have it.

SStarfish ·

@PhoenixPhail oh :( sorry to hear that.. :( have you tried weed or drinking? I heard it helps pain in general (not that i ever tried either but) its better than death eh? 😬 I'll go google this stuff brb

PhoenixPhail · M

Alcohol is off the diet for it, and I have tried some medical weed, but it doesn't seem to do much for me, plus, I really do enjoy sobriety, as funny as that might sound to some people.

Actually, there are lots of things that are better than death.
Chronic pain can be one of them. LOTS of people have chosen it over pain. I'm not there yet, but I do consider it.