So we talked about it

Joel and I had a very long talk last night about my struggles and also about our daughter.

As some of you know we're seeing a new neurologist and she was been wonderful. She'll willing to work with her and me.

My only issue is she asked to see our daughter at her worst. She wants to stress her out to the point of her having another meltdown. Maybe I shouldn't say meltdown maybe I should say panic attack. She wants to observe a 12 year old child forced to become so upset it triggers a panic attack.

I feel like this is not safe or healthy and I wonder if she would ask an adult to trigger a panic attack on purpose.

Joel agrees and we both have decided that we will not allow this to happen. I just can't do that to my baby girl.

I hope she will understand our reasoning for this and will keep seeing her. Our daughter is making great progress in the few short weeks we've been seeing her.

This was been a huge stress for me and I feel much better knowing Joel feels the same way I do.