I’m so sorry you’re having to live with those thoughts. Must be very painful. The only questions that come to mind are, would she want you torturing yourself this way? Would she want your memories of her to be the cause of sadness rather than smiles? How can you live your life in a way that would honor her memory and make her proud?

Forgive me if I’ve overstepped. Those were just some of questions I asked myself when my mom passed away a few years ago.

I lost my dad last year, and for the same reason. I'm so sorry.